


Faded for Her

by HisAsgardianAngel



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Clearly I chose to romance Solas in my playthrough, Dorian is a Good Friend, Dragon Age: Inquisition Spoilers, Established Lavellan/Solas, F/M, I love him, Jealous Solas, Lavellan/Solas Fluff, Lyrium Addiction, M/M, Minor Cassandra Pentaghast/Varric Tethras, Minor Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus, My First Work in This Fandom, Parent Lavellan, Parent Solas, Sera Being an Asshole, Sera also being super protective because reasons that are hard to explain, Sexy Solas, Solas Being Solas, Solas Smut, Solas Spoilers, Solavellan, This is my first playthrough and I'm about to get to "Final Piece", Trespasser Spoilers, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-13 06:02:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5697691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HisAsgardianAngel/pseuds/HisAsgardianAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I decided to name the fic this because I'm starting the story during that quest. First chapter highly hinges on quest, the rest will not. I think you will find out a lot about my canon and who my inquisitor is and what choices she has made as we progress through the story, so this will be fun :) This will be a sappy Solavellan story, with fluff and babies and probably a lot of angst and drama as I continue to progress the game (I've been warned I'm about to have my heart ripped out?) so we will see how this turns out :) hope you enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Skyhold…what a place. When the inquisitor had awoken from collapsing after her brief confrontation with Corypheus in Haven, she had not imagined that things would be getting any better from there on out. However, there was a sparkle of light to be found yet, amid the daunting and suffocating gloom. Solas had spoken to her a great deal about his fear that the elven people would be blamed due to the nature of Corypheus's orb; but all of that seemed to melt away at Skyhold…at Skyhold Solas had changed. Or perhaps he'd always been this way; so gentle and sweet, so romantic. She had never bothered to notice before. Now, that kiss was all she could think about.

Gwyn Lavellan was walking in search of Josephine when she stumbled upon Solas alone in his study. Whatever she had needed with Josie was quickly forgotten, for the troubled expression on her friend's face was unsettling. He took a sip from a small cup, scrunching up his nose in distaste.

"Something wrong with your tea?" Gwyn asked politely, prepared to offer to get him a fresh cup if need be. She had been falling pretty deeply for Solas ever since they had met in Haven. She would have done anything for him.

"It is tea. I detest the stuff. But this morning, I need to shake the dreams from my mind. I may also need a favor." Gwyn's already gentle pink eyes softened, attempting to figure out what was going on in Solas's head. She had fought many a battle by his side, but never had she seen him so distraught.

"All you have to do is ask." Solas shot from his chair excitedly, something stirring inside of the inquisitor as she watched him. He was so anxious…this was a man who was never less than collected. She listened to him explain the plight of his friend, a spirit summoned against its will. How unkind. Gwyn knew better than to simply agree, Solas liked it when she probed his mind with questions.

"I thought spirits wanted to find their way into this world?" Solas smiled almost tenderly.

"Some do certainly, just as many Orlesian peasants wish they could journey to exotic Rivain. But not everyone wants to go to Rivain. My friend is an explorer, seeking lost wisdom and reflecting it. It would happily discuss philosophy with you, but it had no wish to come here physically." Gwyn's eyebrows furrowed, she understood very clearly that even spirits had personal agendas and preferences—but what was so perplexing to her was why in the world a mage would torture a friendly spirit.

"Do you have any idea what the mages want with your friend?" He looked as bewildered as she did.

"No. It knows a great deal of lore and history, but a mage could learn that by simply speaking to it in the fade. It is possible that they seek information it does not wish to give and intend to torture it." There was a slight pang in Gwyn's heart, for she was certain that Solas was likely the only mage of his kind. What he did not seem understand is that not all mages were as worldly or as curious as he was. They were not going to wander the fade, talking amongst the spirits the way they would a living breathing human being. To other mages, the spirits in the fade were probably just viewed as a means to an end, tools to be used and discarded when they ceased to be of use. Gwyn didn't know for sure, she was a rogue archer not a mage, but the very idea made her grimace deeply. The love of your life is a mage, she reminded herself mentally, thinking carefully about what Solas had told her.

"Alright. Let's go get your friend." She resolved warmly, watching with a small smile as some of Solas's nerves visibly eased. He immediately appeared happier.

"Thank you. I got a sense of my friend's location before I awoke. I will mark it on our map." Solas's blue-grey eyes seemed to be staring at Gwyn with a little more than gratitude, a small blush as pink as her vallaslin tinting her angular face. She wanted to say more, but once Solas had marked the map he quickly retreated to ready his things for the expedition. When he'd left her alone, she peered at the map curiously. The Exalted Plains…Ah! Now she remembered why she had been heading to find Josephine in the first place. Gwyn had heard whispers that remnants of her people were still dwelling in the plains, it was something she wanted to consult the War Council about. At this current date, the inquisition had not yet stepped foot in the Exalted Plains. She perked up considerably, this might actually be fun.

First thing was first, Gwyn had decided whilst brushing out her blonde hair back in her quarters, that when they arrived at the Exalted Plains, Solas's needs were to be met before her own. The Dalish could wait, there was someone out there close to her loved one's heart who was hurting. She could not stand for that. She quickly tightened the braid holding back the left side of her hair and looked herself over in the mirror. That would have to do, she threw a few necessities in a bag to saddle onto her Ferelden horse, whom she'd affectionately begun calling 'Tony' and headed toward the war room.

Gwyn embarked on her journey with Solas, Bull, and Dorian in tow. It was safer for the inquisition to travel in small numbers of three or four, and for some reason she had started to prefer these three to others of her companions. Solas was a given, she'd been won by him in more ways than one. The Iron Bull…well, honestly she kept him around for reasons she wasn't proud of. Before Gwyn and Solas had gotten close, she'd flirted with Bull on numerous occasions in Haven. He was kinky…all muscles and eyepatch…even now, as in love as she was with another man it made her happier than almost anything to listen to Bull and Dorian's saucy party banter. The inquisitor was amusing herself with these thoughts when they approached a body not long after entering the Exalted Plains. It was burned, deep claw marks marring the victims skin; she knew they must be close. She wasn't wrong.

"No, no, no." She heard Solas quietly chant to himself, a pained and remorseful expression crossing his face as he realized that they might very well be too late. Gwyn wanted to comfort him, but there was no time, a growling and hissing could be heard in the distance. It was so unfortunate…so sad. They all knew what awaited them just beyond the hill. The silence between the four of them was deafening. When they laid their eyes on the pride demon, all thoughts were on Solas.

"My friend…" It came out a tortured gasp, tears misting the inquisitor's eyes, though she blinked them away before any could notice.

"The mages turned your friend into a demon."

"Yes."

"You said it was a spirit of wisdom, not a fighter." She wasn't accusing him of lying; it was more like processing aloud something that was difficult to swallow. How could anyone who cared about the fade do something like this?

"A spirit becomes a demon when denied its original purpose." Solas was almost shouting, it startled her. She glanced behind herself briefly, Dorian looked as if he wanted to shout back, bless him. He was such a flirt, but Gwyn knew he really valued her friendship. She replied before either he or Bull had a moment to think.

"So they summoned it for something so opposed to its own nature that it was corrupted. Fighting?" She wanted to understand so badly.

"Let us ask them." Solas responded heatedly, glaring daggers at a mage who was slowly making his way toward them. Gwyn found it interesting that he was in no hurry to flee from his creation. What an arrogant fool.

"A mage! You're not with the bandits? Do you have any lyrium potions? Most of us are exhausted, we've been fighting that demon…" Solas looked ready to explode, Gwyn flinched at the intensity of his voice. Solas was the gentlest man she had ever come to know. Where was this rage coming from?

"You summoned that demon! Except it was a spirit of wisdom at the time. You made it kill. You twisted it against its purpose." The mage didn't even look sorry, at least not for the right reasons. The man bowed his head like a shamed child at Solas's outburst. It made Gwyn sick. Dorian and Bull remained silent, although Gwyn very much wished Dorian would hold her right now. He had quickly become the brother she'd never had after the inquisition picked him up in Redcliffe. He refrained, Gwyn had decided, because the poor bastard was probably scared shitless to touch Solas's mate when he was this angry. Rightfully so.

"I…I…I understand how it might be confusing to someone who has not studied demons, but after you help us, I can…"

"We are not here to help you." Solas spat, folding his arms across his chest and narrowing his beautiful grey eyes at the mage. Even in his anger, Gwyn had to admire his grace. She was tempted to try and play devil's advocate, calm Solas down a little and aid the mages at correcting their mistake, but she thought better of it. Solas was not in the mood to be negotiated with, he wasn't the type of person that could be easily talked down, and if she showed so much as an ounce of sympathy for those torturers he would likely feel betrayed.

"Word of advice? I'd hold off on explaining how demons work to my friend here." She opted instead, hoping to at least make her lover feel like someone had his back. Besides, Solas was smarter than them, everyone standing there knew it.

"Listen to me! I was one of the foremost experts in the Kirkwall Circle—" Solas cut him off, a low growl ripping from deep inside his chest.

"Shut up. You summoned it to protect you from the bandits." The mage looked down again, causing Gwyn to internally roll her eyes. That pathetic sod…she was honestly surprised he was still standing. She had never seen Solas kill out of hatred, but she had an eerie feeling that today might be that day.

"I—yes." Inquisitor Lavellan drifted at this point in the conversation. She was vaguely aware that her boyfriend was still berating the mage, but something was prodding at the back of her mind. She had originally wanted to come to the Exalted Plains with the intent of finding her people. She was sure her clan was not here, but it had been so long since she'd been with a fellow Dalish elf. She wanted to know that her people were not being targeted since the whole of Thedas now knew that the leader of the inquisition was elven. It had been an insecurity of hers since the beginning. She was forced from her inner turmoil when she heard Solas shout out her name.

"Inquisitor, please!" She was startled a bit, turning wide magenta eyes to look on Solas. He looked so desperate, she didn't care what he had asked her for, she was going to give it to him. She had memory of hearing someone mention a summoning circle; it wasn't too hard to piece together the proper response.

"I've studied rituals like this. I should be able to disrupt the binding quickly." Solas blinked stupidly at her for a moment, as if he had expected an entirely different response.

"Thank you." One roar from the demon and the mage pushed through Bull and Dorian to get away like the little pussy he was. Sure, Gwyn thought nastily to herself, summon a pride demon and then leave other people to clean up after you.

"We must hurry!" That was all she needed to hear, running off with the rest of her party to effectively get the job done. Bull charged at the demon, keeping it away from Solas and Gwyn as they began to attack the circle's pillars together. Dorian took on a pillar of his own, switching between breaking the barrier and helping Bull periodically. Please don't hurt it. Gwyn thought over and over, shooting exploding arrow after exploding arrow into the barrier as Solas's spiritual energy took out quite a bit on its own. Gwyn had been raised a hunter, her eyes skillfully tracking the demon's movements as she and Solas fought to eliminate the final pillar.

"Bull watch out!" She screamed, watching in horror as her lover's friend nearly made mincemeat of her qunari companion. Bull was the brute strength of the party, so he was the only one fighting on the front line at all times between the four off them. She worried about him so much. She felt Solas take her by the hand comfortingly and she turned her bewildered gaze toward him. One look was all it took, one tiny squeeze of his hand. Everything was going to be okay, they were doing this together. One final shot from each elf shattered the circle, the demon dematerializing into a glowing spirit once more. However, it didn't take an expert on the fade to know that something was very wrong. It was green…so green, and it looked ill; tortured, near death. It was pitiful.

"I'm sorry." Solas uttered softly in elvish as he knelt bittersweet and broken at the spirit's feet. A few words were exchanged between the two of them while Dorian looked at Gwyn solemnly.

"What's he saying?" He whispered. Gwyn had to blink tears from her eyes, it was an awful interaction to watch. The spirit was dying, there was nothing any of them could do. She shook her head very slowly, about to break down. Gwyn was a sensitive person; she always had been. She had hoped the inquisition would harden her heart, though she feared it had done the exact opposite. The more she saw of Thedas, the more heartbreak she experienced over all walks of life, the more room she had in her heart for love and compassion.

"Dorian…" Her voice cracked, about to crumble as he pulled her tight against his chest. He shushed her gently, looking on Solas as he was forced to help the spirit move on. Dorian ebbed Gwyn's tears away with his thumb before nudging her toward Solas. He knew the rift mage was hurting far worse, and a hug from him wasn't what he needed. Dorian wasn't who he needed. She sniffled.

"I heard what it said. It was right. You did help it." Solas did not turn to face her.

"Now I must endure." He said, staring into the nothingness where his friend had once lay. It was gone…and even if it were to return to the fade, it would never again be the same.

"Let me know if I can help." Gwyn offered, knowing better than to approach or touch him until he gave the okay. Solas was not the easiest person to console, he preferred to deal with things alone. Finally, he looked at her, albeit a brief glace as he assured her she'd already done what she could.

"All that remains now is them." Gwyn turned away, turned a blind eye. What was said between them now did not matter. Gwyn knew good and well that Solas was going to kill those mages, and she was not about to stop him. Perhaps then, the inquisition had hardened her in a way. There was a time when she would have intervened to save anyone's life, no matter how unworthy. She guessed now that she'd seen how the world truly worked, those actions and beliefs seemed a little naïve. When it was done, no one spoke a word before Solas. Not Dorian, not Bull…they were all quiet, contemplative.

"I need some time alone. I will meet you back at Skyhold." He didn't so much as glance back, walking off on his own and leaving the three other party members standing baffled with a bunch of slaughtered mages. Gwyn was trying hard to wrap her mind around what had just happened, but she couldn't. Nothing had prepared her for the rage she had just witnessed from a man she thought she knew better than anyone. Dorian tried to lighten the mood, wrapping an arm lazily around Gwyn's shoulder.

"Come on, inquisitor. If you quit looking so glum, I'll let you…inquisit me when we get back to Skyhold." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at her. "Come on, I know you want too, look at me I'm beautiful! I'll just close my eyes and pretend your boobs are nice manly ass cheeks." Gwyn couldn't help herself, she burst into laughter and cuddled into Dorian's side. He was such a mess.

"Can we visit the Dalish camp marked on the map before we go? I wanted to make sure everything was alright." Dorian chuckled and kissed her temple playfully.

"You're the inquisitor, I'll go wherever you lead."

 

(Gwyn, my inquisitor, imaged below)


	2. Chapter 2

Solas was gone for two days after the incident with the pride demon. Inquisitor Lavellan was immediately worried when she returned from the Dalish camp to find that her companion had still not returned to Skyhold. She feared he would never come back to her, realizing there was a part of her that had feared him disappearing from the beginning. He was such a dreamy, fluid person; seeming almost like a spirit himself. Gwyn didn't know half the time if his presence was even real…but she craved it. The sweet feel of his lips against hers was like nothing she had ever experienced in her life, even if it had only technically happened in their sleep. Perhaps that was all she was to him…a pleasant dream. Her mind would have her believe that, but her heart was screaming no. Solas loved her, he had to. Gwyn brushed a few tears from her cheeks and sat up in bed, looking around her quarters in Skyhold lazily.

Ugh…she looked like hell. The inquisitor was not a pretty lady when she woke up in the mornings, or at least she didn't think so. She climbed into the shower, washing her dirty blonde locks of grime and dried blood from the battles she'd fought the day before. Today she thought she might visit the tavern, despite the fact that Sera was always hanging around in there. In spite of her being a fellow elf, Sera seemed to be one of the most racist people she'd met during her time with the inquisition and that really rubbed Gwyn the wrong way. She gingerly touched her vallaslin as she washed her face, thinking of back home. Gwyn was proud to be Dalish, no matter how the world viewed her. Visiting that camp had made her more homesick than she had anticipated. She sighed and turned off the water, not bothering to grab a towel as she walked back into her main chamber.

"Inquisitor…I see you're ready to take me up on my offer?" Dorian teased, startling Gwyn as she grabbed a pillow and playfully whacked him with it.

"You shouldn't sneak up on me, you know. I can be quite deadly." Dorian raised his eyebrows at her and snickered, gesturing leisurely at her naked body.

"What are you going to do, cut me with your nipples?" She grinned, throwing the pillow at him and turning to gather some clothes from the wardrobe.

"If I have to." Dorian laughed, watching her with an amused expression. He had come to bring Gwyn some promising news, news that was sure to make her very happy. A certain mage was waiting for her downstairs, and though Dorian wasn't yet sure how much he approved of his relationship it was worth it to see the inquisitor smile. Genuinely smile.

"Gwyndy, I think you're about to be very happy. I bring tidings from a missing person." Gwyn rolled her eyes at the nickname, Dorian was probably the only person in the entire inquisition that had bothered asking her first name, apart from Solas. Both only used it affectionately, in private, as not to give the impression that any tom, dick, and harry in Skyhold was allowed to do so.

"Oh?" She asked, wondering why this couldn't wait until after nine AM as she began to button her shirt. It didn't hit her until she looked up, noticing the gleam in Dorian's eyes…he meant that…oh that couldn't be who he was talking about could it? Her heart leapt into her throat.

"Solas?" He gave a slight nod, chuckling to himself as she tried to rush passed him in pure unadulterated excitement. He took her by the arm gently.

"Now, now, let's not be too hasty. You cannot meet a man you're deeply enamored with looking sloppy." She was fully dressed, but that wet mane she had for hair was an absolute mess. He grabbed her hairbrush off of the nearby vanity and combed out all the tangles, quickly braiding back the left side as she always did and pecking her on the cheek.

"There you go. You can thank me later." Gwyn smiled tenderly at Dorian and pulled him into a hug, lingering for only a moment before shooting out of his arms and down the stairs like a bat out of hell. She slowed only as she hit the stairs that travelled outside the castle, not wishing to appear like she needed him as much as she did. They locked eyes immediately as she began to descend the staircase, each walking slowing toward one another as if this were a casual meeting. Both knew it was nothing of the sort.

"Inquisitor." He greeted, respectfully keeping his distance. She blinked at him for a moment, unsure of what to say. This wasn't exactly the romantic reunion she had been dreaming about.

"I guess I owe Varric an ale, I wasn't sure you were coming back." She breathed out honestly, a ghost of a smile touching Solas's eyes.

"Neither was I, but only for a short while. You were a true friend; you did everything you could to help. I could hardly abandon you now." Gwyn smiled at him kindly, her heart breaking at the look plastered all over his face.

"The next time you need to mourn, you don't need to be alone." She offered, watching as he bowed his head slightly, baffled by the things she made him feel in his heart. Loving her was unlike anything he had ever experienced, and he had done many an interesting thing.

"It's been so long since I could trust someone."

"I know."

"I'll work on it. And thank you. Do you have a moment?" He asked, looking back toward the castle. She was pleasantly surprised; this was the first time Solas had asked to be alone with her since the kiss in the fade. They had grown closer than ever on missions and walks together, but it was not often that they were truly alone. Always some other ally tagging along.

"Of course." Solas fought the urge to grab her hand as he led her back to her sleeping quarters, not wanting to make a spectacle of things. He was very unsure of what was about to happen, and more importantly what she wanted to happen. It was very fortunate that Dorian had vacated the premises by the time they made it all the way up there. Gwyn didn't really want to think about what Solas might have said or done if he'd found Pavus in her bedroom.

"What were you like, before the Anchor?" Solas asked curiously as he opened her balcony doors and stepped out for some fresh air. She followed closely behind him, thinking about his question for a moment. She looked down at her hand, pondering further as he went on.

"Has it affected you? Changed you in any way? Your mind, your morals, your…spirit?" She shrugged.

"I don't believe so."

"Ah."

"Why do you ask?" He looked perplexed, that was a new demeanor for him. She could tell he was struggling with his beliefs, though she was unsure if they were romantically driven or not at this point.

"You show a wisdom I have not seen since…since my deepest journey's into the ancient memories of the fade. You are not what I expected." She blushed, a shy grin creeping up the corners of her mouth.

"What have I done that's so surprising?" She flirted, curious to know what he really thought of her. Gwyn needed to know, what he thought was the opinion she valued above all others.

"You have shown subtlety in your actions, a wisdom that goes against everything I expected. If the Dalish could raise someone with a spirit like yours, have I misjudged them?" She knew Solas didn't think too highly of her people, and normally she would take offense, but unlike Sera Solas had his reasons. Solas wasn't racist against his own species, he simply had not been met with good will when interacting with this specific subset. The Dalish were unlike the city elves…and Solas was unlike all.

"The Dalish didn't make me like this. The decisions were mine." She could tell that had made him happy, had intrigued him.

"Yes, you are wise to give yourself that due. Although the Dalish, in their fashion may still have guided you. Perhaps that is it. I suppose it must be. Most people act with so little understanding of the world…but not you." They stared into each other's eyes for a few moments before Gwyn finally spoke.

"What does this mean, Solas?"

"It means I have not forgotten the kiss." Gwyn could feel her heart beat fast against her chest, her blood heating as she slowly came to terms with the fact that this was really happening. She'd wanted it for what felt like ages, to kiss him for real. She needed to compare the taste, the feeling, what he smelled like…and most of all she just needed to be with him. Falling in love was the last thing she wanted or expected when she awoke after the explosion at the Conclave, but now that she had it she couldn't imagine ever living without it; without him.

"Good." It was almost a whisper as she closed the distance between them, eyes lidded as she fought to control herself, to even breathe. Being this close to Solas was intoxicating. Their faces came maddeningly close to touching before he backed away, turning to leave before Gwyn grabbed hold of his arm. No ser, she had waited too long for this, he wasn't going anywhere.

"Don't go." He didn't turn around.

"It would be kinder in the long run." She felt her heart sink within her chest. She couldn't understand why he brought her out here and said all of those things if he were just going to break it off now.

"But losing you would…" He turned finally, trailing off as he grabbed Gwyn by the waist and pulled her against his chest. She nearly squeaked with surprise, though there was no time as his lips melted against her own. The kiss was not as chaste as perhaps the first one, it was rougher, more passionate. She moaned lightly, opening her mouth to him as his tongue explored the uncharted territory. Her hands gripped his shirt, wanting to be closer to him though their bodies were pressed as tightly together as physically possible. Solas kissed like a god, he was perfect. She nibbled delicately on his bottom lip before he pulled away, a look of sheer longing dancing in those peculiar eyes of his.

"Ar lath ma, Vhenan." It was a simple declaration of love, but the force he put behind it was staggering. It left Gwyn wanting much more as he turned once more to walk away. This time she was going to let him, leaning on the door frame as she watched him go. He seemed cutely determined to leave things as they were, though he couldn't help looking over his shoulder at her as he began to walk down the steps to the door leading to the main hall. Big mistake. Her lithe, graceful body curved against the wall was more than enough incentive for him to say fuck it. Whatever he was holding back, it was clear his love for her was no longer going to allow it. Gwyn almost didn't know what to do when he strode back to her, pinning her where she stood and crushing their lips back together. In the beginning it was a hard and demanding kiss, though it quickly melted into something tender. She could feel him smiling against her lips, as if he were ecstatic that she was receptive to him in such a way.

"I love you too." She finally whispered as he backed her up until she was pressed against her bed. Solas nipped at the tip of her ear, gently petting her hair with one hand and caressing her body with his other.

"Your actions show me that every day." He whispered sweetly, picking her up and pushing her onto her back against the soft duvet of the bed. She practically purred, rolling them over to where Solas was on bottom and capturing his lips once more. His hands held her hips firmly as she straddled his waist, kissing down his chin and as much of his neck as possible before reaching his high collared clothing. She let out a tiny whine, he was wearing layers and she was not patient. Solas chuckled.

"Next time I'm invited into your chambers I'll remember to forget some of my clothes." She sincerely hoped that was true, sliding down his body and pulling his pants down to just under his ass. She smirked.

"Looks like you did." Sly dog wasn't wearing any underwear. He was half hard already, his cock twitching as she planted a firm kiss right on the tip. Solas couldn't help but laugh.

"I-I never do. I d-don't know many elves who do." He stammered, flushing crimson as she moved her mouth to fully engulf his penis. Solas's eyes rolled to the back of his head, though a hand flew immediately to cup her face.

"Vhenan, you a-are in no way expected to—oh!" He groaned loudly as she bobbed up and down on his dick, stopping only to affectionately kiss and love the appendage in particular areas. It was not a lewd or dirty act, not the way you would expect a blow job to be. She massaged him as she did this, hands exploring every beautiful dip and crevasse of her lover's body. Solas was far too beautiful to not worship him in this way.

"S-Sathan!" (Elvish for Please) He shouted, attempting to keep himself from bucking in to her. Choking his baby was the last thing he wanted to do. His manhood was rigid now, straining inside her mouth as her skilled tongue continued to work its magic.

"My love, you must stop." He urged gently, pulling her up and reversing their roles once more, tenderly removing her own pants and delighting in the fact that she was not wearing undergarments either. He touched her there like it was the most precious thing in the whole world, it made her heart skip a beat.

"I see you decided against certain fabrics as well." He knelt between her legs and pressed his lips against her clit, holding her firmly in one place and smirking against her sex.

"You do not enter an elven temple without first respecting their rites and rituals. Your body is sacred; I will not enter until I have been granted permission." The vibrations of his words against her vagina sent a shiver down her spine, whimpering and caressing the side of his face.

"I would not be laying here now if you did not have my permission." That wasn't good enough for Solas, who chuckled before licking Gwyn's quim agonizingly slow.

"Mm, I know, but I want to hear you say it." She went to tug on his hair, though of course he had none, so she gripped onto his shoulders tightly.

"I need you, Solas. Please take me." That was all he needed to hear, sliding up her body and pulling her up onto her side for better access. He kissed her long, lovingly, their legs tangling together as he slipped deep inside of her. She cried out, Solas stilling his movement immediately and kissed away the fresh tears upon her cheeks.

"I have hurt you?" She flushed pink, embarrassed about what she was about to confess. She couldn't say it in the common tongue…it sounded horrible.

"Telin emen derem em i've ma." (Nobody has touched me before you) She admitted almost shamefully, half afraid Solas would become upset and leave. The taking of someone's virginity wasn't a big deal to all of Thedas, but to her and certainly to Solas it meant something. Solas looked shocked, it was a little hard for him to wrap his mind around the fact that such a beautiful woman had not been bedded before. It made him smile, once he recovered. The inquisitor was more innocent than he ever would have guessed.

"Vhenan you are not alone in this. I have spent most of my adult life exploring the fade, do you think I have ever before now known someone I would give something this precious to?" Gwyn hadn't thought about the possibility that Solas had never had sex either…she had no idea why that was so jarring to her. The look on her face said it all, this was happy news to them both. Solas nuzzled into her sweetly, running his fingers through her pale blonde hair.

"I will move only when you are ready." Gwyn kissed him chastely, giving his hand a squeeze and burying her face into the crook of his neck.

"You may move." Solas rolled his hips into her gently, looking on her with an intensity that would have melted her had it been able.

"Solas!" There was nothing like the feeling of him inside of her, his very essence nestled deep within her own. It was intimate on a level she had not anticipated. Her cry of pleasure egged him on, picking up his pace as he held her very tightly against his body, as if he were afraid he'd never hold her this close again.

Meanwhile, Dorian was sitting with Bull and Sera in the tavern having a few drinks. Dorian and Bull were flirting up a storm per usual while Sera was uttering nonsense about breeches and laughing at her companion's filthy conversation.

"Why don't the two of you just fuck already?" Bull snorted.

"Oh I'd love too, but someone needs to be available if some Corypheus bullshit arises. Think about it, Sera, you haven't seen the inquisitor in several hours, yeah? What do you think she's doing?" Sera shrugged her shoulders.

"I never see her. I think she'd tell me to piss off if I did." Dorian wanted to confirm that suspicion but decided to be nice and not dredge up drama while his best friend was reuniting with her mate.

"Inquisitor Lavellan was very worried about Solas. I don't blame her for wanting to take a load off." He interjected, Sera's face lighting up with a childlike laughter.

"The inquisitor and SOLAS? What are you on about, Dorian? Surely the two elfy-elves aren't shacking up." Dorian and Bull glanced at one another, both holding back smirks as they downed their alcohol. Sera clearly didn't know what it was like to experience the sexual tension radiating off the two of them during missions. Bull chuckled deeply.

"Shit, Sera, I bet you anything Solas has a safe word kinkier than mine. I'd love to see what's going on behind those doors."

Safe word, maybe not. But both Solas and Gwyn alike were pretty sure they would never experience better sex than what was going on between them. Each were about to come undone, Solas's cock ready to emit an explosion like never before. He gripped Gwyn's hair hard, groaning her name loudly as her walls clamped down around him. She was thrown into orgasm, her body trembling in all the right ways as Solas finally blew his load deep inside of her, hiding his face in her shoulder as he did so. He couldn't believe it…he'd just given all of himself to her, and he wasn't even sorry. He pulled her on top of him, his penis still inside of her as cradled her tired body against his chest.

"You are amazing." He whispered, his heart fluttering as she curled into him and very softly placed her hand against the beat of his heart.

"Promise me that this is for always." She whispered sleepily. He kissed the top of her head, happy that she could not see his expression. He looked sad at her words, like that was something he surely could not guarantee, though he wanted to so, so badly. One thing was for certain, no matter what direction life took them both in, no one else would ever have his heart.

"I will love you always." He promised, the only thing he could promise. For Gwyn, that was more than enough.

 

 

(I do not know who drew this but they are awesome and this was my inspiration for the chapter)


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning Gwyn found herself face first in Solas's bare chest. Had they really slept that long? It hadn't even been dark out when they had finished their love making, though she supposed it must have really tired them out since it was their first time. She had half expected to wake up alone, Solas didn't seem the type to stick around for morning after cuddles. Perhaps he is in the fade right now, Gwyn thought dismissively as she tried to slip out of bed to wash herself clean of her lover's seed. Solas's arms tightened around her and he sighed.

"Where might you be going, Gwyndolyn?" She giggled as she nuzzled into him, very surprised by his actions. This was a side of Solas she had never seen before.

"And here I thought you were walking the fade." Solas smiled gently and ran his fingers through her hair.

"Oh I think you will find me doing less of that now that someone has captured my attention." He leaned in for a kiss, but was interrupted when Commander Cullen walked in with some news. Thankfully the covers were wrapped around both elves, so the soldier was not blinded by their nudity.

"I um…had been hoping the rumors were not true, but now that I see that they are I apologize for intruding. I just thought Inquisitor Lavellan would be interested in knowing that her sister arrived this morning." Gwyn sat up in alarm, panic consuming her features immediately. Her sister was a mere fifteen years old, her being here was incredibly dangerous. Gwyn had been ten when she was born and she had practically raised her herself after their father died.

"What is going on? Is mother ill?" Cullen shrugged his shoulders in exasperation, clearly not enthused himself about having someone so young in what might as well have been an open war zone. Solas had thrown his walls back up, speaking to Cullen as if nothing at all out of the ordinary had been going on since early yesterday afternoon.

"Give us a moment, Commander. I will see to it that the young miss Lavellan is taken care of. Please excuse us." Cullen nodded.

"Of course." Upon the ex-Templar's exit Solas slid out of bed and retrieved his pants while Gwyn scurried about in the bathroom in the hopes of scrubbing off the not so pleasant remnants of their night together without taking a proper shower. When each was presentable, the couple walked out into the courtyard to find a teenage girl making eyes at Cullen as he uncomfortably pretended to not notice her and continue about his business. She was a stark contrast to Gwyn; she had jet black hair that hung carelessly in her piercing green eyes. She was a bit more muscular than her sister too, despite her age, and she carried an enormous sword upon her back. Gwyn's lips parted in awe as she approached her.

"Your face…" The last she had seen her sister, right before being sent to the Conclave, there was no vallaslin upon her face. As there should not have been, she hadn't come of age. And yet there, clear as day in thick dark blue blood writing was a vallaslin in honor of the elven deity Falon'din. Her sister nodded.

"I know. Mother forced the Keeper's hand, said she knew I was ready. I honestly think she just wanted me proclaimed to be an adult so she could finally be rid of me." Gwyn knew that their mother had become cold and almost cruel after their father had been murdered by a fellow clan member (after her affections no less) but she had sincerely hoped it wouldn't come to this.

"What of Severus?" She spoke of their adopted brother, the middle child. Her sister sneered.

"Oh he can do no wrong, per usual." Gwyn sighed.

"Solas this is my little sister, Celairiel. Celairiel this is my partner, Solas." Celairiel rose a perfectly arched eyebrow and smirked.

"Partner, eh? You wouldn't rather have the blonde hottie over there?" She was teasing, clearly, but Solas didn't play in to it. He stared at her blankly for a moment, almost disturbed by the ink that marred such a pretty face. Solas had never liked the idea of the vallaslin. Seeing it on his lover was one thing, she was twenty-five, but seeing one on the face of a child was saddening.

"Out of all the gods you could have chosen you picked Falon'din…why?" Celairiel didn't miss a beat.

"Gwyn chose the vallaslin honoring Sylaise because she is goddess of the hearth and protector of women during childbirth, did you know that? Gwyn has always wanted children, to love someone that much is sacred to her. I chose Falon'din for the same reason, god of death. In short, my mother makes me want to die." She proclaimed simply, earning a gasp from her horror stricken sibling.

"Dare you say that in front of me!" Gwyn did not have much care in her heart for their mother either, but the thought of her baby sister being suicidal was like a kick in the stomach. She had cared for her since she was an infant, it was unfathomable to imagine death touching her. Celairiel looked caught off guard at Gwyn's outburst and Solas put a loving hand on the middle of her back.

"Calm yourself, Vhenan. She's but a teenage girl, all children her age think that of their mothers I am sure. She does not mean it." He chuckled softly, turning his grey eyes curiously to the girl before him. She was most peculiar, so very different from what he was expecting. So far the Lavellan woman were quite good at being the opposite of everything Solas had expected.

"You have yet to explain your presence here, Da'len."

"Oh yeah, right. Well, Keeper Istimaethorial sent me with a letter for the inquisition shortly after the vallaslin was finished settling. Yet another reason I think mother wanted rid of me. I gave it to commander cutie over there, he said he would send some soldiers to Wycome to assure the clan that the inquisition isn't holding you hostage or anything." Gwyn wanted to roll her eyes, she didn't know what fixation her sister seemed to have on Cullen but she'd wished she'd given the letter to someone a little more diplomatic like say, Josephine. She wasn't sure how their people were going to respond to inquisition forces marching into the camp, but what was done was done. She sighed.

"Well go on home now, sister. It's not safe for you here. Our last homestead was blown to bits; many good people were lost. I will not put you in any danger by having you stay." Celairiel looked as if she may pout. She folded her arms against her chest and huffed.

"I will not go back home to a mother who loves a child she found in the woods more than she loves her own flesh and blood." She spat, causing Solas to raise his eyebrows in surprise.

"In the woods?" Gwyn nodded.

"When I was around five, mother was teaching me how to use a quiver properly out in a wooded area not too far from our home. While we were out there we heard a woman screaming and followed the sound to a small embankment about a mile out. There was a city elf, laying in the snow…heavily in labor. The gods only know how long the poor thing was out there. This was before my mother became so cold, and she helped the woman deliver her son. She told us she was a slave from Tevinter who had been raped by her master's son, a human mage in an elite family. She knew they would take the baby, so she ran. She had been exposed to the elements for too long, she didn't make it. We adopted the baby into our family. My mother has long since been overly concerned about raising a powerful mage to take care of our family, especially after father passed." Solas thought on this for a long while before responding. It was a horrible story, and he already didn't have the greatest opinion of Tevinter.

"Maybe we should not send your sister back to that household, then. I know it isn't exactly safe, my heart, but we can take better care of her here than letting your mother and brother treat her like she's worthless. Perhaps she can put that sword of hers to good use?" Gwyn wanted to say no, absolutely not, this was her baby sister. However, she knew Celairiel would have to grow up some time, and maybe Solas was right. Maybe it would be best to let her experience the world and be happy while she still can, safe or not. That's better than living safely in misery.

"Alright, fine. Sister…you may join the inquisition under one condition." Celairiel's eyes lit up and Gwyn couldn't help the shit eating grin that spread across her features. Cullen was going to hate her for this.

"Anything."

"You may join…if and only if you join as an apprentice to Commander Cullen. Where he goes, you go, that includes staying in Skyhold if you must, do you understand me? He will help you with your sword skills along the way." The squeal that erupted from that child could have shattered glass and she flung her arms around her sister tightly before running off to go bother the poor soldier she had an intense school girl crush on. Solas couldn't contain his laughter.

"I'm not sure if that was kind or cruel." He took Gwyn by the hand and she leaned into him gently, her head resting on his shoulder as she watched her sister from a far.

"I think that would depend on which one of them you asked." Solas didn't respond, guiding his love by her hand as he walked through the herb garden the inquisition had recently had built. Most unusually, no one was out there and he peeked around a few times for confirmation before gesturing for Gwyn to sit with him on an empty bench.

"So…I have heard Leliana and Seeker Pentaghast speaking of an assassination attempt on Empress Celene of Orlais. Corypheus wants Orlais to fall into ruin and chaos, which is exactly what would happen if the inquisition didn't step in and do something." Of course, this was not news to Gwyn, she had been approached about this before and was well aware that the War Council was preparing to get things in order for the inquisition to make a move.

"Yes. I will do everything I can to put a stop to it." She promised, although she thought his random mention of the issue to be odd. He smiled almost anxiously at her.

"I know. There is to be a ball at the Winter Palace…the inquisition will attend. The advisors, you…and three of your companions, of your choosing." A Cheshire cat grin curled at the corner of Gwyn's mouth, understanding washing over her features.

"Ah, so that's why you brought this up. You want me to take you with me." She teased, a slight blush tinting Solas's normally severely reserved features.

"Well…I only mean to say that if you wanted to bring me along, I'd be more than delighted to dance with someone so graceful." Now it was her turn to senselessly blush.

"I'm not graceful." Solas shot the inquisitor a stern, yet tender look. Solas was probably the only person in all of Thedas that could pull such a thing off.

"It was not a subject of debate." That being said, he closed the distance between the two with a simple, sweet kiss. The kind of kiss that could give you cavities.

"I look forward to this ball," She admitted breathlessly, pulling away to gaze into his eyes. God she loved his eyes, they were seriously the most gorgeous things she'd ever seen. "I will hold you to that, Solas." He smiled, leaning his forehead against her own and sighing.

"Oh I'm counting on it."

(Gwyn's sister, Celairiel)


	4. Chapter 4

Gwyn was attempting to remain stoic as she slipped wordlessly into the bathroom at the Winter Palace for the second time that night. She had just finished dancing with Duchess Florianne and all that spinning had made her dizzy. Florianne had incriminated her own brother, and then Leliana had the nerve to turn right around and suggest they allow Celene to be assassinated. Isn't that what Corypheus wanted? Wouldn't that be letting him win? It only made her head spin more. She wretched as quietly as she possibly could, her stomach clinching hard and causing her to whimper a little. It had been two weeks since Solas had asked her here and those two weeks of preparation had been misery. Here she thought tonight would be the night she could blow off a little stress…and you know, not throw her guts up for once. She sighed and splashed some water on her face at the sink when she was done. Pull yourself together, she thought woefully.

Gwyn had already decided that she could not possibly allow the assassination to go down, no matter how badly she had originally wanted to put Briala into power. There was nothing Gwyn wanted more than to free the elves of Orlais, but she could never justify uprooting a kingdom that desperately needed stability in a full blown civil war. She was fretting over this when she walked absentmindedly out of the lavatory and straight in to her boyfriend, who was leaning leisurely against a statute in the hallway. She was instantly uneasy; she didn't want him to know she still wasn't feeling well. Not when he appeared to be enjoying himself. His eyes lit up the moment he saw her.

"I do adore the heady blend of power, intrigue, danger and sex that permeates these events." She couldn't help but blush at his words, surprised. He looked so handsome in that red uniform, she really should take him out to grand balls more often.

"Do you have any interest in dancing?" Gwyn flirted with a small smile, most of her troubles fading away as she became lost in his eyes. Never mind the fact that dancing had just made her ill, for Solas she'd do it over again in a heartbeat.

"A great deal…although dancing with an Elven Apostate would win you few favors with the court. Besides…you are pale, Vhenan. Do not think I did not notice your disappearing act after your grand moment with the Duchess." Solas said softly, his voice laced with concern. Gwyn sighed and broke their gaze, she really wished he wouldn't worry so much. She was only dizzy.

"Oh Solas, I'm fine." Solas sighed heavily, his eyes bleeding with an emotion she was unable to place. It went beyond just a healthy dose of worry, there was something else swimming around in there, something intense. He very tenderly reached out and cupped her face, caressing her cheek for a subtle moment before resuming his role as her "Elven servant" as ridiculous as that sounded.

"You have not been well ever since—" He paused for a moment, as if he didn't even want to entertain the notion. "…since the night we lay together." Gwyn's eyes widened, unable to even comprehend what he was implying.

"Solas…you can't mean that. There is no way." She blinked stupidly at him for a moment, a pang striking her heart as she realized how sad he looked. It terrified her.

"For both our sakes I hope you're correct." That stung, even if she wasn't pregnant. She flinched slightly and his expression changed immediately, realizing a moment too late that he had hurt her.

"Vhenan I didn't—"

"Yes you did." Gwyn turned on her heel and marched off, tears stinging her magenta colored eyes as she fought to find something to occupy her mind with. This was just great, she may or may not be pregnant in the middle of the end of the world with a baby daddy who wanted nothing to do with it. Wasn't this going to be fun? I don't need you, she thought bitterly to herself. I can kill Corypheus with a baby on my hip all by myself and look damn good doing it. She felt for the key in her pocket that she had picked up off of Empress Celene's advisor…she guessed it was time to head to the royal wing. Focusing on the mission was all she could do now. She gave the signal and regrouped with Solas (whom she paid zero attention to), Dorian, and Bull when it was safe.

They walked up the stairs to the Royal Quarters in an awkward silence. She could feel a little of her anger slipping as they moved, realizing that she was overreacting and very likely hormonal, but she couldn't help the disappointment nestled in her heart. How could the love of your life look you in the eyes and tell you he hopes you aren't carrying his child? Gwyn forced this from her mind quickly as she heard a scream on the upper level of the wing. She ran to the door directly before her and kicked it down in one swift motion, witnessing an elven servant girl crawling away from the masked harlequin they had encountered in the servant's quarters. She wasted no time stalking toward the one cloaked in white, defenestrating them with one blow and turning to face the victim.

"Damn, Solas, what did you do to her?" Dorian swore under his breath, catching a glare from his friend's lover. Gwyn wasn't listening to the heated banter that ensued, her eyes on the poor, trembling woman before her. She knelt down, smiling graciously at the servant's thanks.

"Are you alright?"

"I don't think I'm hurt. No one is supposed to be here…Briala said…I shouldn't have trusted her." Admitted the woman, who stood and brushed herself off. Gwyn's eyebrows rose curiously, perhaps she was more right than she had originally thought when she made the decision to keep the Empress alive and in power.

"Briala told you to come to this wing of the palace?"

"Not personally. The "ambassador" can't be seen talking to the servants. We get coded messages at certain locations but the order came from her. She's been watching the Grand Duke all night, no surprise she wanted someone to search his sister's room." This was Florianne's room…that made no sense. Why would Briala send someone up here to find things out and kill her before she has the opportunity to report her findings?

"Is there anyone else who knows the code and drop location who could have written those orders?"

"I don't know…any of us could do it, but…no. No one else would send me here, it had to be Briala." Gwyn wasn't sure about that, she needed to think. She left the room, needing air and Solas followed behind her quickly. Dorian went to follow suit but Bull grabbed him by the arm, shaking his head at him and allowing the couple some space. Gwyn took a much needed deep breath and Solas reached out tentatively for her hand.

"Our friends don't appear to be following for now. Can we please talk about earlier? I do not wish to leave it like that." Gwyn looked down at her hands, not sure of what there was to possibly say.

"I'm sorry, Solas. I didn't mean for any of this to happen, but it did and now…I'm frightened." Her voice cracked on the last word and he instantly pulled her against his chest, shushing her softly and laying his hand flat against her stomach.

"I'm the one who should be sorry. What I said before, I did not mean that I would be unhappy if you were to be carrying my child, quite the contrary. I have never loved anyone or anything the way I love you. It's just that…Vhenan, if you were to be pregnant it means that my whole heart is on the line here. You're the inquisitor…anything could happen in battle. If we ever lost a child I…I don't think I could ever forgive myself." Gwyn's lips quivered, though Solas's eyes begged her not to cry.

"What are we going to do?" Solas closed his eyes, his hand pressing just a little bit harder against her abdomen.

"Don't fret, Gwyn. I am going to try and verify the pregnancy now, I can probably sense if there is another life here. If there is not, we have nothing to worry about…and if there is, I promise to do everything in my power to make sure you stay safe." Solas was quiet for a few moments, Gwyn's breathing became ragged as she got more and more anxious. When Solas opened his eyes they were shiny, as if he were going to cry and she knew the verdict immediately. Her hand flew over her mouth instantly and he couldn't stop himself, pulling her tight against his body and kissing her hard.

"I love you." She whispered against his lips, her heart aching at the love and the guilt blended into his features. He kissed her forehead and sighed, pulling away as they heard muffled noises coming from a room down the hall.

"I love you too. I will do right by you somehow. Both of you, I swear it. But for now we must move, we can talk about this in depth at Skyhold." Solas alerted Dorian and the Iron Bull that it was time for them to be moving on, carefully approaching the door where a man's voice could be heard. He didn't sound too distressed, but now that Gwyn knew for fact that she was with child she was going to have to exercise a little more caution. Solas pulled her backward gently, shooting her a tender look as he picked the lock to the door himself. There was no way in hell she was going in first.

"This isn't what it looks like! Honestly, I would have preferred it, if it were what it looked like." Said a man, as Gwyn and Dorian fought to sneak a peek from behind a rather scarred looking Solas. There was a soldier spread eagle wide and tethered to a bed…very, very naked.

"The Empress led me to believe I would be rewarded for betraying the Grand Duke. This…this is not what I had hoped for." Gwyn and Dorian exchanged humorous glances, listening half-heartedly as he explained how Celene had nullified Gaspard's threats from the beginning. Gwyn undid his restraints and tried her best not to smirk.

"Don't you dare breathe a word of this." Solas protectively nudged the inquisitor toward the door as the man began to stand, Bull bursting into hard laughter.

"You know, you don't have to be so prude, egghead. I overheard that conversation, I know she's seen the D." Solas rolled his eyes.

"You mean you eavesdropped." Bull shrugged with a lopsided smile.

"Eavesdropped, heard from a distance, same thing. Congrats by the way, on egg mcjunior." Solas snorted, half amused half annoyed, though he decided to pick and choose his battles.

"Thank you." Solas took Gwyn by the hand and led her down the corridor to the only room they had yet to be in, where they all heard what sounded like a Ferelden man shouting at a bunch of the nobles. The couple exchanged weary glances before Dorian pushed ahead and the party ran out into the courtyard. Low and behold it was Florianne standing high and mighty above the darkspawn, who'd have guessed. That was when everything clicked for Gwyn…everything that had happened up until now, the dagger, the harlequin…all staged by the Duchess. Gwyn wasn't afraid of her or her darkspawn, standing front and center before her with a smug smile upon her face. She had expected far more of Corypheus than a spoiled entitled little girl doing his dirty work.

"I fear I'm a bit busy at the moment if you're looking for a dance partner." Solas, Dorian, and Bull all three huddled around her in defensive stances, which only made her feel stronger. The inquisitor wasn't sure if it was the new baby or the air of intrigue about the palace, but tonight she felt on top of the world. Nothing and no one was going to stand in her way.


	5. Chapter 5

Gwyn stood out on the balcony in the cool night air. The Winter Palace was so gorgeous…and yet, she couldn't really find herself in the mood to enjoy it properly. Not the exquisite food or décor, and she couldn't even drink the fine wine in her current state. There was nothing to do but brood. After the confrontation with Florianne (and the spectacle that became of having her publically arrested) she had nothing left to do but let the guilt eat away at her. She didn't know why she had done it…told Celene of all the evidence she had gathered on Gaspard and Briala both. She supposed she had gotten caught up in the moment, in the wonderful and powerful feeling of saving the empress from certain death…she hadn't stopped to ponder Florianne's part in it all. Nothing that had happened had truly been their fault…and now they were to be executed. She was trying and failing to push these thoughts away when Solas met her outside. Morrigan had been enough company, she wasn't really in the mood to talk right now.

"Are you feeling alright?" His eyes were full of so much worry that it melted her heart. She sighed heavily, trying so hard to will herself not to cry.

"I made a mistake Solas…I think Florianne planted the evidence I found on Briala and Gaspard…and now two innocent people are to die by my ignorance." Solas wrapped his arms around her from behind, one hand cradling her mid-section tenderly and the other rubbed her back in comfort.

"I do not believe either one of them were truly innocent. Not really, no one of nobility in these times seems to be innocent. It does not do good to dwell on it, Vhenan, you did what we came here to do. Save the empress, foil Corypheus's plan, you should enjoy the fleeting moment of victory." She smiled, lacing her fingers with Solas's hand that lay upon her stomach.

"I guess you're right. For our baby's sake at least, I should take a breather." Solas pressed a kiss to her neck gently and turned her around in his arms, bowing slightly and offering her his free hand.

"Come, before the band stops playing, dance with me." She smiled.

"I'd love to." Solas pressed their bodies together oh so softly, Gwyn's head resting against the beat of his heart as he slowly swayed with her. They were each so out of their element, and yet, their bodies moved perfectly together. Solas could feel the beat of Gwyn's heart against his chest, his breath catching in his throat as he pondered the night's events. He had no idea what he was going to do…this changed everything. Corypheus's orb…the veil…Fen'harel…all of it. He was about to be a father; his plans were not prepared for this. He had felt her changing him from the beginning but now…now it was all too real. This wasn't just a kiss in the fade anymore. And yet…there wasn't an ounce of him that could bother being sorry. He wanted this baby just as much, if not more than she did. Something would have to give. He caressed her face tentatively and whispered in her ear.

"I will move in to your quarters at Skyhold…I think I should be by your side in the night, just in case anything happens." Gwyn couldn't help the ghost of a grin that tented her features.

"Worried I can't take care of our elfling on my own?" She teased, earning a loving kiss to her forehead before he very slowly (as not to make her ill) twirled her around in his arms and dipped her back as the song came to a conclusion.

"I am sure you could, Inquisitor, but I would not want you to. I want to be there for every moment." He admitted softly. She gripped his shirt tighter and hummed happily.

"What will the others say? You know the moment you begin living with me people will suspect—"

"I do not have a care, Gwyndolyn. Let them say what they will. All that matters is that I see to it that you and our child make it out of this alive. It will not be easy, but I will die trying if I have to." Gwyn wrapped her arms around his neck and touched their forehead's together tenderly.

"Can we go home? I'm tired." Solas smiled, pecking her lips lightly and shaking his head.

"My love I fear we are a long way from the Free Marches." She couldn't help but snort at that.

"No. Skyhold is my home. Our home." Solas kissed her temple and pulled out of their embrace, though his eyes were still glued to her every move. Gwyn was starting to get the feeling Solas would be watching her a lot more often now that he had more invested in her than just his love. Not that she minded, she thought it was sort of cute that Solas was protective.

"As you wish, Vhenan."  
*********************  
They did not make it back to Skyhold until late. Gwyn told Solas to meet her back in her quarters, she wanted to check and make sure her sister had been well while they were away. She hadn't had much time the last few weeks to see if her sibling had been adjusting well to the inquisition, she felt guilty.

"Cullen, have you seen Celairiel?" She whispered, catching the Commander as he was about to head to his own place of rest. Cullen looked a little irritable, sighing and shaking his head at her question.

"Lady Lavellan is in the garden praying." Gwyn's eyebrows rose.

"….she's…praying?" Cullen nodded.

"She found out I was Andrastian…please don't ask." Gwyn fought the laughter building in her chest, her sister really did have an intense crush on the former knight-commander.

"I'm sorry, Cullen. I honestly thought her fascination with you would have subsided by now." To her surprise, Cullen actually managed a lopsided smile and a hearty chuckle.

"Oh it's not all bad, inquisitor. I sort of love the little squirt, in a kid sister kind of way. I just wish she loved me as a brother." Gwyn giggled.

"She'll get there, let the luster wear off a little. She's never been away from home before now, everything is new and exciting." Cullen bowed a goodnight and Gwyn wandered off toward the herb garden, where there was a door that led to a shrine to Andraste herself. Just as Commander Rutherford promised, her little sister was knelt before the altar, whispering the Chant of Light.

"Celairiel? You silly thing…would you really forsake the gods of our people for the faith of a man you've known for two weeks?" Her sister jumped, startled, and smiled broadly at her.

"You've returned!" She hopped from her place on the ground and all but tackled Gwyn, who rolled her eyes and placed a gentle kiss upon her sister's cheek.

"Watch it, kiddo, precious cargo." Celairiel's eyebrows furrowed.

"How do you mean?" Gwyn took her baby sister by the hand and placed it very delicately against her stomach. She didn't say a word; she didn't have to. Celairiel's pale green eyes widened and brightened, shock seizing her as she stared into her sibling's face.

"I am to be an aunt? You and…the bald guy…?" Gwyn closed her eyes and sighed heavily.

"His name is Solas…but yes, the bald guy." For a moment she wasn't sure her sister was going to take the news well. Gwyn had been the only parent figure in her life just about, considering their mother spent all her time with the perfect son of the household. Would she be jealous?

"But Miss Vivienne says you're the Herald of Andraste…how are you going to do the will of the Maker if you have to worry about a baby?" Gwyn blinked at her sibling in surprise. What had the inner circle done to her while she was away?

"You don't honestly believe that I'm—" She stopped herself, there was no way she could step on all the faith and admiration written in those eyes. If every fifteen-year-old girl looked up to their sister like that there would be no such thing as broken families.

"I don't want you to worry about that, Celly. Everything is going to be alright, I promise. Run along now, it's late. I'm sure Cullen will want you bright eyed and bushy tailed tomorrow morning, he has a lot to catch up on." That seemed to light a fire under her, the young girl sprinting off to go get some rest and living Gwyn in absolute awe. Kids were…weird. She supposed she'd better get used to that.

Finally, after what felt like the longest day in history she made her way back to her sleeping quarters. Solas already had the bed pulled back and was waiting for her patiently, reading a book while relaxing on what he had claimed as his side of the bed. She smiled lovingly at him.

"I just found Celairiel praying to Andraste…reciting the chant of light to a tee." Solas closed his book, an amused expression creeping onto his face.

"That does not surprise me. As enamored as she is with our very own Templar knight. Poor thing's heart will be broken when she finds out he is thirty years old." Gwyn crawled onto the bed with him and curled into his side.

"Not so sure that will stop her from trying." Solas pulled her on top of him, gazing into her eyes for a few moments before running his fingers through her hair.

"Well, Vhenan, I think I promised you a conversation about what happens next, if you aren't too tired." Gwyn nuzzled in to his chest sleepily, she was incredibly tired, but she wanted to talk about the baby so desperately.

"I would love to talk, if you'd like." Solas seemed to think for a few moments, thinking out his own options before offering anything to her. He wanted to flirt with the idea that everything he had planned had just gone out the window. He wanted that so badly…and either way, there was so much guilt to weigh on his heart. He didn't know what to do. He loved her more than anything in the entire world, he was going to have to find a way to make it work. He couldn't lose her, especially not now. Couldn't lose either of them.

"I've wandered the fade my whole life, I don't have a proper home…and somehow I doubt you want to settle down in Wycome with your clan after all this is over. I want to raise our child away from all this. From the slavery among the city elves…and the backward ways of the Dalish. I want this child to make its own way in this world. I am not sure where we should settle down, assuming the three of us make it out of this alive." Gwyn grimaced.

"I don't always agree with my people but we aren't backwards." Solas sighed.

"My apologies. I meant you no offence…but you aren't like the lot of them, you know. Most Dalish pretend to keep to the old ways without any knowledge of how the old ways actually were." Gwyn reached up and kissed him chastely.

"It's alright. You're right, I don't want our baby growing up around the clan either. Where would you like to go? We could settle almost anywhere. Somewhere quiet…away from most." Solas's grip around her tightened, happily imagining what their life together could be like, if he'd let it. It had so much potential.

"We did just end the civil war; we could make our home right here in Ferelden. Find a clearing out in the woods someplace, build a small house." He rubbed small circles lovingly on her back, not noticing as her eyes began to flutter. "I would build our child a crib…and a room to grow into. He/She would be the safest, happiest elf in all of Thedas, I can assure you. Free, loved, and the child of the Herald of Andraste and an Apostate no less, so by birth right infamous. How does that sound?" When there was no response he peered down, realizing she had fallen asleep in his arms. He smiled.

"Goodnight, ma vhenan."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ophelia Trevelyan belongs to the lovely SonyaBlackmane and Alaine belongs to MakBarnes :)

Gwyn, Solas, Dorian, and Bull were out scouting the Hinterlands this day, in avoidance of the catastrophe that was going on within the walls of Skyhold. Cassandra was so angry, no beyond angry, she was enraged, splenetic even. Varric had brought Hawke, champion of Kirkwall to speak to the inquisitor about defeating Corypheus. He spoke of a warden that may be of use, though he had not tracked him down quite yet. For this, apparently Varric was a bastard, though Gwyn thought Cassandra was being unreasonable. Hawke had fought hard in Kirkwall, why should he have been expected to lead the inquisition and do it all over again? That didn't feel right.

At any rate, the party couldn't take the bickering anymore. Solas had thought the fresh Ferelden air would be good for the baby, anyway, so here they were. They had not been out long before running into a widow on the outskirts, just west of camp. Templar "bastards" as she had so aptly put it had murdered her husband and stole his wedding ring, accusing it of being a magic talisman. This had tugged on Gwyn's heartstrings far more than it likely would have if she hadn't been battling her first trimester, but she was bound and determined to somehow make things easier on poor Maura. She had gripped Solas's hand tightly and trudged off in hot pursuit, much to the amusement of her friends. Gwyn had sided with the mages for a reason, she already didn't trust the Templars…but now it was personal. They had messed with love, and right now that was something she wasn't willing to stand for.

They had wandered off into the Crossroads, though Bull had tried to gently dissuade their going in this direction. He loved the boss, he knew she was sensitive anyway, so especially now he was weary of setting her loose near starving refugees. Gwyn would want to stop and help everyone she saw, and the inquisition just didn't have that sort of time. He watched as her large eyes scanned the premises for Templars, only to land on three woman working with the wounded. Gwyn tilted her head to the side…one of the women, an elf…she looked so familiar. Her skin was dark, rich, beautiful. Long black hair pulled sleekly into a bun, and gentle eyes as blue as her vallaslin…it couldn't be.

"Ellana?" The elf turned, smiling broadly at Gwyn and beginning a friendly wave. So it was her…Ellana had been a mage trained in healing magic within the Lavellan clan. She was the best healer in Wycome, so what then was she doing here?

"Gwyn! Or is it Inquisitor now? It's good to see you." Ellana pulled Gwyn into a hug and introduced herself briefly to Solas, Bull, and Dorian. She gestured toward the other two ladies in her company. One was pale and blonde, also appearing to be Dalish although Gwyn did not recognize her as one of her own. The other was a very beautiful, petite human woman. She had brunette hair and dark brown eyes that told a tragic story. Gwyn tilted her head to the side, curious.

"Who are your friends, and what are you doing so far from home? I can't image the keeper sent you away as much as the clan relies on your aid." Ellana smiled.

"Oh how rude of me, this is Ophelia Trevelyan, youngest child of a noble family in Ostwick, and our elven friend here is Alaine. We each have our own reasons for being here…Ophelia can't stand living among the nobility and sought to use her strength where she was needed, and Alaine is sick with the blight. She was exiled by her clan, who seems to think her contagious, though they do not seem to realize taint is only spread through blood. I found her wandering around by herself on my way here and I brought her with me. As for me, took off from Wycome in search of your sister and became distracted here. It isn't right, what your mother did to her." Gwyn's eyebrows furrowed.

"Is it true, then? Mother really was trying to force her out of the house?" Ellana looked grim, solemn. Gwyn had been one of her closest friend's growing up, and she wished her no emotional harm. The entire clan was aware of Gwyn's mother's…ambitions. It was a real shame.

"Silevien is to be wed to the Keepers father…and your brother is to become her next in line…her right hand." Gwyn paled instantly and Solas grabbed her waist in case she was to become faint. Her mother was going to remarry…just to make sure Severus was to become Keeper?

"Celairiel got forced out of the nest when she publically opposed the marriage…embarrassed Silevien half to death." Gwyn felt like she was going to vomit…why hadn't her sister told her the entire story when she arrived at Skyhold? Ophelia seemed to notice the shattered expression on the inquisitors face and shot her a sympathetic smile. She knew the pains of having an unbearable family life all too well.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm a firm believer that family doesn't end in blood. I am sure you have everyone you could possibly need in that Inquisition of yours." The ghost of a smile that crossed Solas's face didn't go unnoticed as he tentatively ran his fingers along Gwyn's abdomen. She laced her fingers between his own and gave them a squeeze, grateful for his tiny reminder that Ophelia had no idea how right she was.

"That is true, my advisors and inner circle have been more of a family to me since the conclave than I've ever had in my life. Thank you, Lady Trevelyan." Ophelia scrunched up her nose.

"Just…Ophelia. Please." Gwyn nodded instantly, in apology, trying her damndest to ignore Ellana as those keen ice blue eyes of hers darted suspiciously between her and Solas. Ellana had always been that one friend that wasn't happy unless her nose was planted firmly in all her friend's love lives. She was a very sweet, gentle girl…but one hell of a gossip.

"Yes, of course, forgive me. Miss Ophelia, then, would you mind telling us if you've spotted any Templars loitering around the area? We're looking for something." Alaine was the first to pipe up, having wandered all around these parts before Ellana ever found her.

"Oh no, most rouge Templars have run off toward Dwarfson's Pass. Haven't bothered the refugees in a fortnight, I'd wager good fighters like Ophelia keep them away. We can take you out that way, if you'd like. Ellana isn't the only healer floating about, we can afford to step away."

Gwyn had not wanted to take from those who were in need, but the ladies had insisted that the camp would not miss them and so they set off toward the pass. She and Solas had unglued themselves from one another, walking as far apart as physically possible. Solas was happy to lend his support and an affectionate touch here and there when she needed it, but when they were out the pair tried their best to appear unattached and uninvolved with one another. Gwyn was also hoping this would keep Ellana from opening her mouth as they travelled…she was not ready for all of Thedas to know she was with child. Dorian, however, could not take the silence.

"So…Alaine, is it? Tell me, how exactly did you catch the blight? I have a dear friend with the same ailment, it's a nasty thing." The young elf sighed, turning her deep blue eyes toward the mage with a forlorn expression.

"I'm Dalish. I'm sure you've heard from your Lady Herald that Dalish Clans keep to themselves…we're all over, try not to stick our encampments too close together. The Inquisitor and Ellana come from Clan Lavellan, in the Free Marches...I come from the Tathviel Clan of Crestwood. We had made homes of Crestwood's caves before the mayor oh so kindly decided to fill them with blighted refugees. We tried to heal them, we did everything we could for those people…but one day I was taking care of one of the sicker of the children and she vomited blood all over me. I must have had an open cut or scratch…I'm not entirely sure, but the next thing I knew I had fallen ill. I was the first of the clan to contract the illness, madness followed. They banished me and tried to push the refugees out of the caves…from what I've heard, that ended in the mayor flooding them all out. I have no idea if any of my clansmen even survived." Dorian looked appalled.

"Flooded? You mean he drowned them…to keep the blight from spreading?" Alaine nodded.

"So I've heard. I haven't had the courage to return and see for myself. I must confess, I accompanied you because I'm looking for a Templar myself. I knew a Knight-Commander once, a long time ago…he used to sneak off to come and see me when the Order was in town, make sure none of his men had bothered me, since I am a mage." She blushed. "He didn't like my kind very much at first but we…" She trailed off, grabbing her staff as the group walked straight into a couple of Templars.

"Speak of the devil…" There was a brief skirmish, though with as large a group as they had it didn't take very long to knock them on their asses. Dorian kicked at one of the dead bodies cautiously, making sure it was truly dead before he attempted to loot.

"Hope it wasn't the Templar you were looking for…" Alaine snorted.

"Nope, is he the one you were looking for?" Dorian checked in all of his pockets and shook his head with a sigh as Solas ransacked the belongings of the other body.

"No. Solas?" Solas could feel something small and round in one of the top compartments of the Templar's armor, pulling it out and smiling down at it as he held it in his hand. It was a simple, but beautiful elven promise ring. He stared at it for a few moments, glancing at Gwyn from the corner of his eye. He almost wanted to keep it, for her, though that went against anything and everything he believed was right. Looking on something like this made him crave that sort of life, when this was all over. It was a selfish thought indeed, but it would make her so happy…

"Solas." Dorian repeated, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"Sorry, yes. I have found Maura's ring; we should get going." He recovered smoothly. "I was inspecting it to be sure it was elven." That was good enough for Dorian, who started back toward the outskirts without a seconds more thought. Gwyn beamed at Solas, peering lovingly at the Dalish jewelry in his hand.

"I'm so glad we found it, it must mean the world to her." That yanked on the apostate's heartstrings hard, feeling like the entirety of gravity was centering around the inquisitor. Oh she was too good for him, now more than ever he could see that clear as day. He knew he should leave, should have left long before. But now there was a child, a child who like their mother would be better off without him, though he knew he was too selfish to go. He just couldn't do it…and thus, he was going to be having a word with Harritt upon their return. Solas was lost in these thoughts when he overheard Ophelia approach the inquisitor.

"Lady Inquisitor," Gwyn cut her off with a playful smile.

"No, no, just Gwyn." Ophelia laughed.

"Alright, Just Gwyn…I was wondering if you needed any dual wields fighting for your cause. I've been with the refugees a long time, they are in good hands with or without me, and I know the only way to truly help them and everyone else out of this mess is to see to it that Corypheus meets his end." Gwyn looked surprised, normally it was her and Leliana who did all the work in gaining agents. It was not often that anyone sought them out like this.

"Of course! Welcome to the Inquisition, Ophelia." Alaine and Ellana locked eyes with one another and smirked.

"What about a healer and a mage?" Gwyn sighed heavily, she loved Ellana like a sister but there was so much she could be doing for the people of Ferelden. Taking a dual wield and a mage she wouldn't lose much sleep over, but a healer? These people needed all the help they could get.

"A mage, sure, but Ellana you know you are needed here. Don't you dare forsake the lives of these refugees, no matter how noble a cause the inquisition may be." Dorian nodded in agreeance, but Bull shook his head firmly.

"Boss, you aren't thinking straight. This is a good opportunity you're throwing away here. There are wounded in Skyhold that need as much help as the people here, and we are lacking in a good healer. On top of that, you're pregnant. None of us know how to take care of you, not even super elf over there." He reasoned, gesturing toward Solas. "You need her." Damn it Bull…now the cat was out of the bag. Ellana's eyes widened.

"You're…Sylaise bless you, why didn't you tell me? You know good and well that Dalish healers make for excellent midwives…that's practically all the clan had me doing before I left." Gwyn sighed in resignation and looked to Solas for the final verdict, who didn't seem to need to think on it much.

"Vhenan, if she can help you in any way that I cannot I would be more than happy to have her on board." She melted under the tender, pleading gaze of her lover and her will finally dissolved.

"I guess that settles it then. Ladies…welcome aboard."

 

(Ellana Lavellan)

(Alaine)(Ophelia)


	7. Chapter 7

Upon returning the ring to Maura the group thought it best to head back to Skyhold so that Ophelia, Alaine, and Ellana could make themselves comfortable. Hopefully Cassandra and Varric had either cooled off or holed up in their quarters, they were sure somebody must have told them to can it by now, it had been several hours. That…or maybe they were having aggressive make up sex, which was highly likely according to Dorian.

Solas was trying to think of ways to busy the inquisitor as they approached the castle. He just needed her to step away long enough for him to have a conversation with Harritt down in the armory. He briefly considered telling her he required her to pour over elven runes in the library and report back to him…something she and Dorian would no doubt have fun doing. He was pondering that when they walked toward Commander Cullen, who was teaching Celairiel how to properly aim that giant brute she called a sword. Alaine's eyes widened, her body freezing instantly as she finally laid eyes upon the knight-commander she'd long been in search of.

"Cullen…" She breathed, attracting his attention as he looked up from training with his little shadow. Cullen looked like he had been kicked in the stomach, all the color completely draining from his features.

"Alaine? My god it's like seeing a ghost…I…I heard what happened to the Dalish in Crestwood. I thought you were dead." Alaine's eyes were filled to the brim with tears, Gwyn was unable to distinguish the type. There was so much happiness and grief alike in her expression, for all she knew it was both.

"I might as well be." She said softly, her voice cracking as he dropped his sword and walked toward her. Dorian and Gwyn exchanged bewildered glances, hardly believing that out of all the former knight-commanders in Thedas, Rutherford was the one she'd been in love with all those years ago. Cullen very softly rested his forehead against the elf's, heartbreak clear as day on his face.

"Don't say that. Why didn't you come before now? Why didn't you find me?"

"I didn't want you to hurt. I'm sick, Cullen…and I won't ever get better. But the closer I get to death the more afraid I am of being alone…being without you. So I had to do what I could, to get here…to get to you…" She trailed off, unable to say much else as she was consumed by sobs. Cullen pulled her against his chest tightly, whispering in her ear sweetly as he held her, completely unaware of the tortured gaze lingering on him from his side. Gwyn looked sympathetically at her sister, whose face was full of jealousy, regret…betrayal. All things you wish never touch the heart of your sibling.

"But…but I thought…" She stammered, backing away from Cullen slowly as the tears began to slowly trickle down her cheeks. Cullen turned to face her, blue eyes laced with a blend of guilt and shock.

"Celly…darling, you're fifteen years old...I can't, we can't…I am sorry if I ever gave you that impression." Celairiel opened her mouth as if she were going to defend herself, but nothing came out. She looked to her sister, her Herald of Andraste, but there was nothing Gwyn could do…she was exactly half the Commander's age.

"Sister…" Celairiel shook her head violently and ran off in the direction of the tavern, Gwyn beginning to run after her instantly while Cullen pleaded that she see reason. Solas grabbed Dorian by the coat and pushing him encouragingly toward Gwyn.

"Keep close to her, please. I have to go do something, urgent. Go!" Dorian rushed off after Gwyn and Solas tried to slip away from the chaos as quickly as possible. He would make sure to be back to their quarters quick enough to comfort the inquisitor, but this was his chance to sneak into the armory without her suspecting. He didn't know what he was doing half of the time, mind torn between flight and commitment of the highest form. He didn't dare think about it, his heart driving him forward as he marched down to the undercroft and nervously eyed the smith, who was quietly bickering with a Dwarven female that Solas presumed to be the arcanist. He stood there, still as a statue like a gentleman before the squabble had ended. Harritt seemed to jump out of his skin as he finally noticed the apostate from his peripheral vision.

"What can I do you for, Solas? Not often that I see you around here, normally the Lady Herald comes and fetches your armor." A brief smirk curled to the far corners of his lips.

"I am not here for crafting purposes. Not today." Harritt raised his eyebrows curiously.

"Oh?" Solas was almost unsure of how he should word this…his eyes staring most uncomfortably at Harritt's mustache. Solas was only used to expressing his feelings to one person and one person alone. He had been removed from dealings with this world for far too long. Communication was difficult for him.

"Do you…by chance, make items that are for more…recreational use?" He had tried to choose his words carefully, although the expression plastered upon the smith's face suggested that he should have chosen wiser than he had.

"Listen, I uh…I've told Bull and Dorian this a thousand times. I don't make that kind of…equipment. Makes me feel all filthy, and the inquisitor deserves to be treated like a lady—" Solas turned every color under the sun the moment he realized the error of his speech.

"Certainly not! My intensions are not perverse; I seek a ring." Harritt was inclined to ask what kind before he noticed the look brewing behind the elf's eyes. It was a look he'd seen a thousand times, on many different men. Love stricken, broken, humbled.

"Ah, engagement?" Solas gave a curt nod.

"Dalish, preferably. I want it to say…well, I think you can guess what I need this to symbolize." Harritt smiled.

"Of course, anything for the inquisitor. Consider it done…on one condition." Now it was Solas's turn to raise his eyebrows and utter an amused "Oh?". Of course there was to be payment, Solas would give him any amount of coin he could wish for so long as everything was perfect.

"I know she means a lot to you, but she means a lot to the world too. You take care of her, you hear me?" Solas was taken back, having expected a price, not a promise. Gwyn really did mean everything to the people of Thedas didn't she? His little beacon of hope. He smiled fondly at the thought, bowing his head in agreement.

"I give you my word."

Meanwhile, Celairiel had ran into the tavern and up the stairs to the small room where Sera most always took residence. There was a small circle of individuals she had become close to while with the inquisition, mainly Sera, Vivienne, and Cassandra. She would have normally sought Varric as a shoulder to cry on, whom she'd also grown an attachment to, but she had been avoiding him all week because of his fight with Cassandra. Out of all of them, Sera was the one who understood what it meant to be an elf that wasn't elfy, and so it was her who was sought after for comfort instead.

The rogue had been drawing crudely in her journal when the young girl had walked in all tears and drama, something Sera was in no way accustomed to. Sera had pretty much always fended for herself, she was tough and had tough friends. All this weepy stuff was for sissies.

"Oh come now, Dark and Broody. What are you being such a baby about? Woman up." She struggled, though her heart melted a little as she saw the teens heart visibly break in her eyes.

"He hates me…I know he must. No one would lead me to believe they loved me and yet share their affections so freely with another." Sera had hung out with Celairiel long enough, she didn't need a name to know exactly who she was referring to.

"The jack boot has a not so lovely lady I see? I mean what did you expect, Cel, your gracious lady bits are a little…little, yeah? You're a kid." Celairiel's jaw hardened, giving the other woman a look that could have frightened Corypheus himself.

"I expected him to wait for me…I expected my SISTER to stand up for me, but no…no she looked like she agreed with the little Dalish quim, she's the one that brought her here!" Her outburst started off angry, but sputtered off into yet another cry. Sera sighed heavily and pulled Celairiel against her, an arm around her shoulder as she tried to think of something to lift her spirits.

"Listen, don't take this the wrong way but your sister has her head shoved up Solas's arse so high all she knows how to spew is his elven shite. They aren't like us; we see the world the way it is. Don't let it bother you, you can stay up here with me if you want…that is, if you are down for helping me stick a bucket above the door to Josephine's office." She offered with a smirk, earning a small sniffle and a hug from her friend. It was about that time that Gwyn reached the doorway, Dorian trailing behind her.

"Cel—" Sera cut her off, stepping protectively in front of the young girl.

"Back off, inquisitor. She doesn't want to see you right now." Gwyn tried really hard not to sneer at Sera, she wasn't in the mood to fight with anyone right now.

"Please, she's my sister." Sera turned up her nose.

"Yeah, some sister you are. You care more about bumping bits with Solas and your little bun in the oven than you do anyone else. She's hurting, leave her be." That hurt Gwyn far more than she was willing to admit, backing up a little as Dorian put a loving hand upon her shoulder and piped up from behind her.

"That's not exactly fair, Sera. Mistress Lavellan has a lot of duties, she can't afford to watch after her kid sister every waking moment. That doesn't mean she doesn't care, for pities sake she raised her. Celairiel your sister loves you to pieces." That didn't sit well with Sera who scoffed in disgusted before rolling her eyes.

"That's because she's the same as every leader of these sorts, they don't care about the little people, always duty this and duty that. But how much you wanna bet she'll drop that act quick and leave us all Corypheus bait after she pops that baby out?" Gwyn had had enough; she couldn't take it anymore. She gently nudged Dorian out of her way and walked hastily back toward her quarters. She willed he self not to cry until she was alone, she wasn't giving anyone the satisfaction of her weakness. Solas was there, on the balcony, gripping something tight in his hand. His expression was one of concern and deep thought, which only increased when he turned to see her enter.

"Love, are you well? You look…" Gwyn had cried on Solas enough; it was not happening today. She blinked the tears away and smiled up at him, though she knew good and well he could see right through her.

"I will be okay. What's on your mind?" Solas shook his head, reaching out to very softly caress the side of her face. It hadn't taken Harritt long at all to make something so small…but now wasn't right. She was miserable, he could see it in her eyes.

"Not now, Vhenan. I would rather show you when you are of a better mind, and your heart isn't torn. I know things must have taken an ill turn with your sister, and for that I am truly sorry. I know what she means to you." Gwyn kissed him hard, pouring in every bit of adoration and frustration inside of her.

"Please? It would make me feel better to hear your thoughts, you calm me." Solas laughed gently.

"It is more than just thought, my heart. I have a question to ask of you…a serious question." Gwyn laced her fingers between Solas's free hand and looked up at him from underneath her eyelashes.

"Well now you have to tell me, I'm curious." Solas kissed her once more, chastely, as if it were for the very first time. Gwyn couldn't help but blush, her hand covering her mouth as Solas knelt before her.

"Vhenan I do not have much to offer you. I have nothing to my name save for the undying love and affection my heart bestows upon you every time you are near me. Love I could never and will never give to another. You already have me, Gwyndolyn, all of me. So I guess…all I'm asking…if you will have me for that long…would you…?" Gwyn couldn't speak, the sudden emotions that filled her chest causing everything to come out at once. She burst into heavy tears, Solas's eyes darkening sadly as he stood to comfort her. He knew why she wept, it was one of everything. His fingers tangled in her blonde locks as he shushed her gently.

"Say you'll marry me." He whispered brokenly into her hair, his whole body pleading with him as he rocked her gently in his arms. Despite her harsh tears he felt her smile against his neck as she fought to find the words.

"Of course." A relieved, and surprised expression flooded his features, slipping the ring onto her finger without moving from their embrace. He continued to sooth her, holding her even tighter against his body as he nuzzled into her.

"It's going to be okay, I promise you that. I'm going to make this all okay." He kissed her forehead tenderly, and in that moment…when all else seemed completely and utterly desolate…she believed him.


	8. Chapter 8

It was well into Gwyn's third month of pregnancy when things were finally in order to meet with Hawke in Crestwood. She had a tiny bump now, one that was still pretty easy to conceal when she tried, but around Skyhold it was now officially no secret that a baby was to be born to the inquisitor. Cassandra took the news the hardest, incredibly concerned about the fate of inquisition were the pregnancy to go sour. That being said, Cassandra and Blackwall both had become increasingly protective of Gwyn, and everyone was suspicious that those two had grown more attached to that baby than anyone else in the inner circle.

It was because of this that Bull had fought hard for his place by the inquisitor's side to make the trek to Crestwood. Cassandra had not wanted them to go anywhere without her protection, which everyone thought was arguably the sweetest thing the Seeker had ever said in her life. But in the end, Bull had convinced Cass that the inquisitor needed her most back at Skyhold, defending the fortress that was keeping this baby safe.

Now the usual company of Dorian, Bull and Solas were watching as Tony trotted ahead of their own horses, Gwyn sitting firmly on his back and absentmindedly petting his long dark mane. She adored that horse. She had been cuddling as close to him as possible as they neared Crestwood, it was raining cats and dogs. Solas could see that she was shivering, pulling his own steed up beside hers so that he could reach to drape his robes around her shoulders. Gwyn glanced over in surprise.

"Solas…won't you be cold?" He smiled tenderly, Gwyn's breath catching in her throat at the pure adoration plastered across his face.

"Do not worry about me, Vhenan. Come, we are almost there." He was right, they were nearing a small clearing that appeared to hold the entrance to a cave. Just outside stood Hawke, arms folded and face grim. They each hopped off of their horses quickly and tethered them off to the side, approaching the Champion of Kirkwall wearily.

"Glad you made it, I just got here myself. My contact with the wardens should be at the back of the cave." Gwyn opened her mouth to respond but was cut off by a mousey squeak of a sneeze, Solas's arms immediately wrapping around her and nestling at her stomach.

"We need to get you inside." As he said this, however, his voice wavered, the inflection of emotion twisting slightly. Most would not have taken note, but it worried Gwyn. She turned around in his arms to look at him, perplexed by the expression she found there.

"What is it?" She breathed quietly, a little frightened of the things she saw in his eyes. A severe amount of love and joy, yes, but also a great amount of fear.

"Two…" Gwyn raised an eyebrow at him incredulously.

"Um…?" Solas wanted to speak but he just couldn't, and Hawke was looking at them like they'd gone completely mad. Dorian snorted, laughing as the awkward silence grew to be unbearable.

"They do that whole talking with their eyes thing, don't mind them. But uh…Solas? You did want the inquisitor out of the rain did you not? It's unhealthy for the young one." Solas's brows furrowed and he honestly looked as if he might suffocate on the very words caught in his throat.

"Young ones. Plural." Gwyn backed out of his embrace, eyes wide and mouth hung slightly ajar. Had that really been what he had meant by two? She was having…no…that couldn't be….

"T-Twins? But wouldn't you have sensed that earlier?" There was nothing scarier than knowing Solas of all people didn't have a clue. How was it possible out of all the times Solas had cuddled her growing abdomen these past three months, he never sensed the other child until now? It was as if Solas had read her mind, he knew exactly what she thinking.

"Get inside the cave, Vhenan. Please. I suspect…I suspect child number two may have my natural talent for magic. It's possible it was concealing itself, only making its presence known to me because it's distressed. You're too cold." Well that was true, she felt cold all the way to her bones. She backed into the cave, still in shock, especially at the thought of her unborn child being so uncomfortable it had to ask its daddy to make mommy go somewhere warm. Hawke didn't follow, probably one hundred percent weirded out. Gwyn wasn't watching where she was going, backing too far into something solid and yelping as the figure drew a sword on her. Solas growled loudly and Hawke ran in after them at the sound of Gwyn's yell.

"It's just us, I brought the inquisitor." The mustached silhouette glanced around briefly, narrowing his eyes at Solas, who looked as if he might grip his jugular out at any moment. He trusted Hawke, however, and cautiously lowered the sword from the inquisitor's neck.

"My name is Stroud, and I am at your service, inquisitor." Gwyn scoffed at him in disbelief. After all of this, that is what he had to say to her?

"Most of you wardens disappear. Then I run into a darkspawn Magister named Corypheus. Do you think that one might have something to do with the other?" Her tone was slightly accusatory but Stroud didn't react to it, like a true gentleman.

"I fear it is so. When my friend Hawke slew Corypheus, Weisshaupt was happy to put the matter to rest. But an archdemon can survive wounds that seem fatal, and I feared Corypheus might possess the same power. My investigation uncovered clues, but no proof. Then, not long after, every warden in Orlais began to hear the Calling." Hawke gasped, awe painted into his every feature.

"Maker, why didn't you tell me?"

"It was a grey warden matter. I was bound by an oath of secrecy." Gwyn didn't understand…she didn't know Blackwall perhaps as much as she should have. What the hell was a calling?

"Is the Calling some sort of grey warden ritual?" Stroud turned to face her.

"The Calling tells a warden that the blight will soon claim him. Starts with dreams. Then comes whispers in his head. The warden says his farewells and goes to the Deep Roads to meet his death in combat." That didn't make any sense. Why hadn't the inquisitions very own warden complained of this white noise inside his head? Why hadn't he spoken up? Something in Gwyn's gut just didn't feel right, and this was no morning sickness.

"And every grey warden in Orlais is hearing that right now? They think they're dying?"

"Yes. Likely because of Corypheus. If the wardens fall who will stand against the next blight? It is our greatest fear." This seemed to piss Hawke off, and Gwyn could see the same look brewing in Solas's eyes. This wasn't going to end well for the wardens if they had their way, she was sure of it.

"So Corypheus isn't controlling them, he's bluffing them with this calling and they're falling for it." Gwyn tried to be reasonable, she could feel it in her heart that the warden's weren't doing harm on purpose.

"So the warden's think they're dying and have stopped thinking clearly? That won't go well." That had to be it…they were scared. Solas pulled Gwyn toward him as Stroud neared her a little too close for his liking, the warden sighing heavily as he did so.

"We are the only ones who can slay archdemons. Without us the next blight will consume the world. Warden-Commander Clarel spoke of a blood magic ritual to prevent future blights before we all perished. When I protested the plan as madness my own comrades turned on me. Grey wardens are gathering here, in the Western Approach. It is an ancient Tevinter ritual tower, meet me there and we will find answers." He grimaced with a gesture toward the map.

There were many a terrible thing to be wrought in the Western Approach and Adamant alike. Blood sacrifices for Tevinter magic, wardens dying buy the dozen, and perhaps worst of all…that damned archdemon dragon from Haven had reared its ugly head once more. But that wasn't the scariest part, was it? No…Gwyn would have been a fool to think it would be. But even she was unprepared for the sheer palpable fright that tore through her body as she thought she was falling to her death…to her children's death. No matter what her life was worth, it meant nothing in comparison to the lives of those babies…one of which she'd known about for only a few short hours. It wouldn't end like this, it couldn't. She heard Solas cry out her name, a shout into the void that broke her heart into pieces, her mind subconsciously opening a rift and pulling the entire party to safety.

That is…if you could call being in the physical fade being safe. Solas had ran to her side, helping her to her feet and pulling her very gently against his chest. One of his hands tore tenderly into her hair instantaneously and his other shot up her shirt, cupping her small bump tenderly and not caring who saw it.

"Vhenan…" Gwyn groaned but smiled delicately at her apostate.

"It's okay, I landed on my back, they're fine." Solas leaned in to kiss her, though he stopped when Hawke wondered curiously out-loud if they were dead. Solas glanced around, allowing himself a moments amazement now that he wasn't so worried about the twins.

"No, this is the fade. The inquisitor opened a rift. We came through…and survived. I never thought I would ever find myself here physically…look. The black city, almost close enough to touch." Gwyn grinned at the pure awe written in every chord of his voice. She cuddled into his side.

"It's amazing." She mused in agreement.

If only it had stayed amazing. Within the deepest recesses of the fade they had discovered what was possibly the spirit of Divine Justinia. She had helped Gwyn recover her memories of the conclave, which had apparently been kept from her by a demon of fear that had made this section of the fade its lair. Now that they were facing in Gwyn knew something was very wrong. She'd never been seized by fear quite like this. She tried to fight it, and for a good portion of the battle she was successful…but as she tired it seemed easier and easier for the demon to get inside her mind.

"You'll lose them." She heard it whisper inside her head, feeling her arrow drop from her hand as a nightmarish scenario began to flash before her eyes. She screamed for it to get out of her head, though her lips would not move. She was immobile, paralyzed by her own fear as she fought to shake the horrific images from her brain. She could see two stillborn children, Solas's dead and lifeless eyes looking on their tiny faces as he blamed her. It was her fault they didn't make it; she should have left the inquisition the moment she found out she was expecting. She screamed Solas's name, sobs ripping through her chest as she fell prey to the demon's tricks. Solas lowered his staff in alarm, demanding to know what the spirit was doing to her.

"This." Was its cagey reply, shoving its spindly claws deep into her back and twisting. Solas lost it, a power radiating off of him that no one in the party had ever seen before. An almost explosive magic shot from his entire body, withering the demon to nothing as he struggled toward his lover.

"S-Solas…what in the world…can you even walk?" Dorian exclaimed in bewilderment. The spell or whatever the hell it was had obviously taken a huge toll on the apostate, though he willed himself to be strong for Gwyn. Solas lifted her into his arms, examining her wound carefully before proceeding.

"We must go, now. She's losing a lot of blood." He gave 0 fucks that he had just used all of the power he had been recovering since his awakening. That he had just shown the pure essence of a god to everyone there. He may have just given everything away, but it would be worth it times a million if it could save them. Fen'harel had taken the inquisitor, and by his grace her life and these children would be spared, if it was the last thing he did.


	9. Chapter 9

It was cold, rainy. Ophelia Trevelyan and Warden Blackwall were sharing a tent, amongst the rest of the inquisition forces awaiting the return of the inquisitor and company from the depths of the fade. Everyone was worried, tense, afraid that both their leader and the children nestled safely inside of her were not going to make it back. No one should enter the fade physically, not even skilled rift mages like Solas. Blackwall was clearly worried, he and Cassandra both had grown attached to the little one (they did not yet know of the other), and Ophelia, who had grown close to the warden these last few months wanted to help him relax. He hadn't slept all night.

"Gordon…she's gonna need you when she gets back. You should try to rest." He sighed and propped up on his side, his tired eyes gazing at her face for a few solemn moments. He loved her so much. He hadn't said it yet, but he didn't have to, the way his eyes poured over her every curve and crevasse, always as if he were memorizing it. Like it was the last time he'd ever lay eyes on her beauty.

"I should be there. I am a Warden, after all. If anyone could make them see reason," Ophelia cut him off, forcing him to look at her and leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

"You know why the Inquisitor did not take you. She's perceptive, that one. She knows…" Blackwall grunted, eyes boring into her own as if he were looking straight into her soul.

"Knows what, that you're enamored with me? That's not an excuse. You know how I feel about you, but that will never relieve me from my sense of duty. My lady, she was…kind, to keep us in mind. But foolish. Perhaps more foolish than this inquisition can afford." There was no malice in his voice, only worry. He knew it would devastate the inquisitor beyond reason if she were to lose that child. She couldn't afford to be crippled by pain, not when so much was at stake. Ophelia sighed heavily and playfully smacked him in the shoulder.

"You know I hate to be called that." A small smirk danced inside the warden's eyes, though he willed it to not stretch across his face. He pinned Ophelia's wrists against the bedroll lightly, his face lingering close enough that she could feel his beard tickle her neck.

"Oh? Is there a problem, my lady?" Ophelia narrowed her eyes at him, she was no lady, and two could play at this game. She put on a scarily innocent face, looking up at him from underneath her eyelashes.

"There is a problem indeed. A big, strong bear is trying to eat me…and I don't know what to do." She batted those eyelashes at him, an evil smile gracing her features as she slid her leg between his thighs. He growled, not helping his situation as she let out a gasp of mock horror.

"Please! Don't hurt me!" She leaned forward and bit his neck hard, her leg continuing to massage him in a place he was fighting hard to ignore. When he spoke his voice was husky, choked…like he was running short of air.

"The whole camp is going to think I'm hurting you, stop—" She opened her mouth to scream 'help' at the top of her lungs, but Blackwall quickly strangled her cry with his hand. He cupped it over her mouth and sneered at her, infuriated by the absolute joy shinning in her eyes. Was this to be his punishment? Fine, he could do her one better. He tore at his armor and slid Ophelia down the bed, closer to his body. She yelped in surprise, a devious expression permanently glued to her face.

"You're going to wish I was a bear by the time I'm finished with you." He promised darkly, pulling her into a hard kiss while he threaded his fingers into her hair. She practically purred, ridding herself of the rest of her clothing as her legs wrapped around his waist. His hands groped her breasts as his tongue dominated her mouth, her back arching sweetly against the bedroll. He rolled into her slowly, holding her hips in place with his large, calloused hands. They were rough in all the right ways. Ophelia moaned into his mouth, her fingers finding their way into his long brunette locks, tugging them sharply.

Ophelia fought to switch their positions, wrestling Blackwall onto his back and grinding against him hard, cursing under her breath at the feeling of her body pressed so tightly against his own. He chucked, reaching to tenderly brush her hair from her eyes.

"Language, soldier. Maybe you aren't a lady after all." He teased, delighting in the beautiful laugh it elicited. He caressed her cheek gently and she nuzzled into it.

"You don't quite seem to be bear material either." He growled again.

"I'm too much man to be a bear." Blackwall picked up his pace as he said this, bucking into her so hard she had to stifle a scream. Yeah…she didn't deny he was a whole lot of man. She scratched down his chest as she about came undone, her legs trembling beneath her as he continued his thrusts. He hit her sweet spot every time, a strangled cry ringing from his throat as Ophelia orgasmed around him. He held her tightly, kissing her with force and passion as he finally spilled his seed inside of her. Blackwall wrapped his arms around her as she collapsed on top of him, ready to make some offhanded sassy remark regarding this bear scenario, though he never had the opportunity.

"Warden—Bloody…why is it always me?" Cullen whined as he entered the tent, lifting a hand to shield his eyes from the sight before him. If he wasn't walking in on Solas and the inquisitor he was walking in on these two. Blackwall didn't seem so concerned, lazily reaching up to cover Ophelia's body with a sheet. Cullen shook the images from his mind.

"Ser, the inquisitor has returned from the fade. She's injured, Solas has her, you should make haste." That seemed to light a fire under both Blackwall and Ophelia, who dressed quickly and met everyone outside. Gwyn was in Solas's arms, blood all over the both of them as he quickly rushed her toward Ellana for healing. Gwyn was not conscious, and many members of the inner circle exchanged nervous glances…who was going to deal with the wardens? One of their rank were the first to speak.

"We have no one left of any significant rank, what do we do now?" Cassandra was the one who answered, brow furrowed as she looked on Solas. He was clearly distraught, but the ring on the inquisitor's finger was hard to ignore. It was only right that they do this properly, and the engagement made Solas their leader's next to kin. Celairiel was far too young, and had stayed behind with Sera back at Skyhold.

"We look to Solas for a decision. He is family to our leader, and must therefore speak on her behalf. A choice must be made immediately." Solas was taken back, tearing his fingers reluctantly from Gwyn's hair, which he had been stroking while he watched Ellana work on her with a critical eye. He did not question the authority bestowed upon him, striding toward the warden with a hardened jaw. He was scathing on the inside, they could all see it.

"Leave. The unfortunate truth is that you're still vulnerable to Corypheus. Without Stroud to guide you leaving the wardens unchecked is not a risk I am willing to take. By the authority of the inquisition, you are banished from southern Thedas. Hawke will oversee your return to the warden fortress at Weisshaupt." Hawke bowed his head sadly, as if he didn't agree with the decision but the warden took it with a grain of salt.

"Yes, Ser. I wish the inquisitor well." Solas was about to thank the warden when Blackwall spoke up. Solas half expected him to be hostile, though he didn't appear that way.

"Solas…I would stay, if you allow it, and continue our fight." Solas nodded, unable to see a reason why Blackwall should not be allowed to stay. After all, he'd fought against the Calling had he not?

"Of course. I have never doubted your loyalty Blackwall, and I am certain our inquisitor hasn't either." Hawke smiled at that and bowed slightly, though there was still a hint of sadness buried in his eyes.

"Take care of her, it has been an honor to fight beside the inquisition." Ophelia and Cassandra both looked angry, and even Dorian looked as if he wanted to give the apostate and elbow to the face. It didn't appear to be a popular decision, but he knew it was the right one. Their stupidity had almost cost him everything good in his life, and he'd be damned if he gave them the opportunity to be that stupid again.

"I hope Gwyndy approves of your choice. She'd be the only one." Dorian sighed under his breath, though Solas heard him loud and clear. He turned his gaze toward her, looking on her sadly as her wound continued to gush blood. Her being angry with him was always a better option than her being dead.

"Solas, I can heal her but we have to get her out of here. Now."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They rushed back to Skyhold as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, it was not back to good news. Solas and Ellana ran off with Gwyn, but there was something else going on within the castle. Alaine ran into Cullen's arms the moment he arrived, though it did not appear to be on happy terms. Tears were running down her face, Cullen tilting her chin upward in an attempt at getting her to look him in the eyes.

"Lainie, what's wrong?" The sweet, nurturing tone to his voice seemed to calm her a little, but there was an intense guilt and sorrow burning behind her eyes that he had never seen there before. It was frightening.

"The inquisitor's sister, Celairiel…she found a ring in your office and a letter…" Oh no…Cullen's blood ran cold. This meant Celairiel had seen some things that clearly would have hurt her, but it also meant Cullen's engagement plans were ruined. He sighed sadly and gently caressed the side of her face.

"I'm so sorry that the surprise got botched…I…I was gonna leave that letter for you before I left and surprise you with the ring when I returned but I got too nervous…" Alaine cut him off, shaking her head at him fiercely.

"No, no, don't worry about me. You need to go to Sera's loft up in the Tavern. There is something that you need to see." A pang of fear crept into Cullen's heart, but he willed himself not to show it in front of her, squeezing her fingers gently.

"Okay, I will go. Just tell me…the ring…do you…would you?" Alaine laughed softly, a beautiful, bittersweet chime.

"I accept. Of course I'll marry you." Cullen smirked and pecked her on the lips, putting just enough force behind it to promise a celebration later. With that he turned, walking briskly toward the tavern. He knew that Sera had become Celairiel's best friend these last few months, and had been consoling her. He almost felt like his beloved had set him up to walk into an active war zone, there was no doubt a very angry elf awaiting him.

Cullen knocked politely on the door, being pulled inside swiftly and roughly by a furious Sera. Oh yeah…he was definitely in trouble. Sera's face was red, tear-streaked. It occurred to him rather suddenly that he'd never seen her cry before. It wasn't something he ever wanted to see again.

"About time you showed up, Commander." She spat. Cullen furrowed his brows.

"What in the world is going on." Sera thrust a piece of paper at him and grabbed him by the arm harshly, forcing him to turn around and look at the far corner of her room. There Celairiel lay, still as a statue, pale as death.

"We found her like that this morning, in the chantry garden near the statue of Andraste. Guess Andraste and I both failed to protect her, but the rest is on you!" She barked, utter confusion wrecking the former knight-captain's features. He looked down at the fragile piece of parchment Sera had forced into his hand.

My dearest Cullen,

I believe that I understand now. I have read your letter and seen your ring, and I know that they are not meant for me. The words you have written for your beloved are inspiring, yet wounding. You love her with the same passion and adoration that I feel for you, and I cannot meddle with that. I wish you both happiness in your marriage and I am most sorry that I cannot be there to see it. Perhaps in the next life, my love, but in this one I am not equipped with the skills necessary to live in this world without you. I pray for your forgiveness, truly. Tell Gwyn she needn't worry about me anymore. The Maker takes care of me now.

Yours always,

Celairiel

"Is she…" He choked, glancing at her body in heartbreak. Sera could see that the note was killing him inside, her tone softening a bit as she responded.

"She took all the lyrium you had in that box on your desk. It shocked her system, she couldn't…yeah. She's gone." Cullen dropped to his knees, face in his hands as his body shook with a hard sob. It was all his fault…and now the inquisitor had one less person she could count on. What had he done?


	10. Chapter 10

There was pain bleeding over all of the Inquisitor's senses. Her whole body ached, deep magenta eyes squinting harshly as the bright light surrounding her blinded her vision. Where was she? What had just happened? She was lying on her side, she must have a wound to her back, as that was where most of the pain was originating. She fought hard to remember…Adamant…twins…fear demon…that must have been it. She didn't know what the demon had done to her, but the vision he had left her with was still haunting her, ringing in her ears. You'll lose them…it had said. She slowly moved her hands to the security of her small bump, fighting hard to get her eyes to adjust. She felt someone else's hands on her stomach and her gaze turned toward whomsoever was beside her.

"Solas? Was he right? Did we…did we lose them?" When at last her vision centered, she regretted it instantly. Solas was wrecked, eyes red, tear stained cheeks. He looked as if he hadn't slept in days.

"Vhenan…" He whispered, moving one hand to gently cup her cheek. "No my love, we didn't lose our children. They are safe. Bull was right to advise you to keep Ellana around, she's an excellent healer. The important thing is that the bleeding has stopped, and over the course of the last few days your wound has mostly healed with time and magic. It'll just be a little sore. We are very fortunate." Gwyn's heart began to race, worry flooding her every thought, every inch of her body.

"Days? How long was I out? The inquisition it…it needs me!" Solas nodded gravely.

"Indeed it does. No one has known what to do without you, things have been a bit of a mess, and Seeker Pentaghast is most unhappy. Mostly with me. You've been unconscious for about five days, and in that time I've been making all the decisions around here in your place. I believe most of them have been considerably unpopular. I do not envy your job, Gwyndolyn. Moral dilemma is not my strong suit." Gwyn thought on this for a few moments, considering his words very carefully. If he had been making all these decisions in her absence, as much as she loved him she was certain diplomacy had gone out the window. Solas was sometimes a little forceful when he was passionate about something he was feeling. She hoped she could patch things up quickly with Cassandra when she'd be up and walking again.

"What's the damage?" Solas was quiet for a beat too long, avoiding her eyes as he sat and played with a strand of her pale blonde hair. He didn't want to tell her everything that had gone on while she was unconscious. She was going to be devastated.

"Solas…you're frightening me. What have you done?" The elf sighed sadly.

"I fear you needn't worry about what I've done, but what your sister has done." Gwyn rose an eyebrow expectantly and Solas continued. "I'll start with my actions first, as they are least worrisome. First, I have banished the Wardens from Southern Thedas. It has been a wildly unpopular notion, but it was the only way to keep everyone safe, the wardens included. They were reckless and weak, and I know that if we bring them into our home as allies it would be a grave mistake. They are not strong enough to ward off Corypheus, they cannot be trusted here until we've slain the Magister." Gwyn nodded in understanding. It made sense, it did…though she understood why the opinion was unpopular. Grey Wardens were revered as the saviors of Thedas, to banish them is almost sacrilege.

"They will be welcomed back with open arms after we shoot Corypheus full of arrows. They are the only ones who can stop a blight, and they are an honorable people." This was not a question, nor a request. It was an order, and a stern one. Solas nodded, feeling slightly chastised, though her reaction was thankfully much more mild than what he'd been dealing with the last week.

"You'll be thankful to know that I did not banish Blackwall with them, I know you're fond of him. He remains holed up in the barn with Ophelia. The only other thing I have enacted on your behalf was rendering the judgement of Ser Ruth, a lingering warden who turned herself in after the ritual killings at Adamant. I had her put in the stocks and sentenced her to hard labor in the mines. I would have simply sent her to be with the rest of the Order, but she insisted she wanted to send a message. I thought it more merciful than the death she was asking for. I would not incur blood upon the hand of my lover. That wasn't my choice to make in your name. Although Vivienne seems to be the only one who approved of that choice." Gwyn didn't think that to be unreasonable, and she nodded at Solas with a warm smile. More than he felt he was deserving of.

"If it makes you feel better, I would have probably conjured a similar sentence. I must ask you though…what of my sister? You said I should be concerned about her own choices…what is it exactly that she's done? I hope she hasn't bothered poor Cullen again, the man is at his wits—" Solas raised a hand to gently silence the inquisitor, his lovely grey eyes darkening sadly as be prepared to break to her the news of her sisters passing. He was frightened of how she would take it. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it softly, thinking for a moment, as if to properly articulate how he should go about this.

"Vhenan…I'm afraid she has done more than bother the Commander. Cullen is absolutely devastated, he hasn't eaten in days." Alarm tore through her, though she couldn't find her voice to speak, and her lover continued on. "Gwyn, Celairiel is…she has gone where we cannot follow. She found a letter Cullen was to give to Alaine, along with an engagement ring. According to Sera, she couldn't live with herself knowing that her affections for him were in the way of his happiness with another. So she…overdosed on the Lyrium she found upon the Commander's desk. I am so, so sorry." Gwyn brought her hands to her mouth slowly, the horror of what she'd just heard washing upon her like a cripplingly slow wave. Tears were upon her eyes instantly, a weep ripping from her chest as Solas immediately moved to comfort her. The apostate raised her up in his arms gently, moving her as gently as possible to the other side of the bed so he could climb in with her, his arms snaking around her as he pulled her against his chest.

"I…is there anything I can do? Anything at all to ease your suffering?" Solas was in anguish, he'd known how much this was going to destroy her, and watching her unravel was going to kill him. She couldn't answer, crying harshly into his chest as her fingers gripped his shirt tightly. Her baby sister…gone…as cold and blue as the vallaslin that marred her sweet, beautiful little face. The vallaslin that honored the elven god of the dead…to whom she now woefully returned.

"Solas no! Falon'Din cannot have her! I want her back!" She shouted between gasps for air, the tears rolling out like the torrential downpour of a storm. A thousand thoughts were through her mind…who was going to tell her mother? Why hadn't Sera been able to stop this from happening? But most importantly…why had she not seen this coming? She knew Celairiel had an unhealthy infatuation with Cullen and she did nothing but encourage it. She should have never assigned her sister to be under Cullen's teaching, what on Earth did she think would become of that? This was all her fault. Only fifteen years old…fifteen years of being tossed aside by their mother for a brother that wasn't even blood, and then Gwyn had turned right around and done the same thing. She hadn't given her sister the attention she needed, at such an impressionable age. The inquisition should not have come above her family…she'd been so busy with the rifts and Solas…and the pregnancy. How could she have left her only sister to fall by the sidelines, how could she have ignored her?

"I failed her, Solas. I should have been here, I should have—" Solas shushed her softly, running his fingers through her hair in an attempt at consoling her.

"This was not your fault, my heart. It is difficult…children are full of so many hormones at that age, especially as she was becoming a young lady. She was changing, and the world around her was changing rapidly too. It is hard to give stability to a child in times like these. The sky is torn, people are dying. There is no one to blame here but Corypheus. What Celairiel felt for Cullen was childish infatuation, you were not wrong to dismiss it. I think it is hard for a girl at that age to distinguish a mere crush from real love, and tragic were the circumstances…all the things that factored in to this tragedy: the crush, Alaine, the situation with your mother, the breach in the sky itself, puberty...that would be too much for any adolescent to handle." Solas was right and she knew that, but it did very little to ease the pain tearing her heart to shreds.

"Will you take me to her?" She asked quietly, Solas planting a firm, tender kiss to the center of her forehead.

"Of course." Solas helped Gwyn from her bed and wrapped one of her arms around his shoulders so he could support her as she walked. Her body was still in quite a bit of pain, and it was difficult yet for her to stand on her own. Celairiel had been buried out in the herb garden, near the door that led to the statue of Andraste, where they had found her body. Her sword was standing erect beside her headstone, which looked to have been hand-carved. Bless him, it was Varric's handwriting. It read 'May Andraste carry the faithful to the seat of the Maker, and none was more faithful than she who lay here. In loving memory of Celairiel Lavellan, brave warrior, sister, and friend.' At the foot of the grave knelt an elf, who Gwyn instantly recognized as Alaine.

"I beseech your forgiveness, Celly. I did not mean to take him from you, I didn't know how much you truly loved him. I sincerely regret my search for the Knight-Captain and my coming to the inquisition. If I had stayed away I know that our Inquisitor would still have a sister, and I regret that most of all. My search for Cullen was selfish, and that I knew from the beginning. I'm dying too, Cel. I've got the damn blight. Why did I indulge myself in the fantasy that we could ever be together? Now the man we love will be heartbroken a second time, when I inevitably join you by the Maker's side. I pray that you forgive me before then, sweet girl, as I will be alone when I depart from this world. It would be nice to have a friend." She then paused, removing the engagement ring from her finger and placing it delicately beside a rose atop her grave.

"I want you to have it. If I had minded my own business and stayed with the refugees, where I was needed, maybe one day it would have been meant for you when you were a little older. No matter what anyone else said, Cullen really did adore you. I know it." She quieted, then. Wiping stray tears from her face, she stood and turned, though she stopped dead in her tracks when she realized who it was that stood behind her. Her deep blue eyes were bloodshot from all the crying and she was pale as a ghost, she didn't look well. Gwyn looked on her kindly, though Alaine didn't feel she deserved it.

"Do not look at me like that, Inquisitor. I am undeserving of your mercy. No apology I give to you will be enough to sooth what I have done, and if you wish me gone or executed or what have you, I will gladly accept my punishment." Gwyn's eyebrows rose in surprise.

"Alaine…I do not blame you for what happened to my sister. If anyone I blame myself. I enabled the situation, you were not at fault for any actions on either mine or my sisters accounts. I do appreciate what you told Celairiel…but it was not necessary. Please do take your ring back, there is no sense in you not marrying Cullen after all this." Alaine shook her head.

"No, ma'am. The ring belongs to her now, I dare not take it back. Cullen and I…well. I do not know if we will be a going concern for much longer. My health is deteriorating quicker than I'd hoped, and I don't think he wants to see me right now. He's been in the Tavern drinking with Sera for days, won't even look at me." Gwyn didn't know what to say, looking away from the other elf's face as the grief overwhelmed them both. Solas grimaced, shaking his head in disappointment.

"Then Celairiel died for nothing. It isn't right for him to forsake you now, after all that has happened surrounding your engagement. If he pushes you away, and the blight takes you, I fear we will have lost three good people to this situation. Cullen would never recover." Alaine scoffed, raising her voice at the apostate slightly.

"You think I don't know that? But will it be better for us to marry, and then he become a fast widower? Do you honestly think that would help him? Either way the damage has been done. I've killed them both." Gwyn's face brightened suddenly, an idea springing into her head.

"Not necessarily. The blight does not have to take you. There is one way to cure it…though…it's a major risk." Solas sighed heavily and put his face in his hand.

"If you are suggesting she become a Grey Warden, I'm afraid that's more of a risk than it's worth. Not everyone survives the joining, and in case you've forgotten, my love, I banished the Grey Wardens." A small, bittersweet smile tugged at the corners of Gwyn's lips as she looked on her sister's grave longingly. This is what Celairiel would have wanted; for Cullen to be happy as long as possible.

"Not all of them." Blackwall was about to become a very busy man.

**Author's Note:**

> Characters belong to bioware


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